Saturday, June 22, 2013
So this evening I was handed a dime. In fact about 20 minutes ago. Right now that dime means more than the ten cents the federal reserve has placed on it.
For some backstory:
In 2000, my dad's health began to decline. In 2004 he had a quadruple bypass. The surgeon actually destroyed part of his heart, not being able to reconnect an artery. In 2007 he had gastric bypass surgery to save his life. If he hadn't had that done he wouldn't have made it a year. His kidneys had already begun to fail. Around 2008 or 9 he begun having strokes and mini heartattacks. Linked to problems his excess weight had been covering up.
Fast forward to recently, he's been passing out. In fact Monday while I was recovering from a weekend of third shifts he passed out in our front lawn. The one time he needed me and I wasn't there. Luckily he had been talking to a neighbor when he passed out and she was there to get him help. His current cardiologist doesn't think its heart related but wants to do a heart cath to make sure. Its been 2 years since his last one but he's had somewhere close to 7 since 2007. For the past few years he's been running (barely) on 20% of his heart. He's scared to get this one done, thinking he may not make it off the table. But that's what they told him when he had his gastric bypass done, he wasn't suppose to make it but he did. Since 2004 I've been so worried about which time I'm going to lose him. I want him to get the cath done to prove to the cardiologist that it is heart related but I share some of my dad's fears. He's in pain constantly and he sleeps more than he's awake.
So back to the dime...a friend of ours shared a belief she had that when someone close to you passes on they let you know they are thinking of you by a dime appearing. Mind you this only became noticable in my family when her mother died whom we were all close to. Each time my father has been sick I've found a dime in the most random places. Either in a suitcase I hadn't used in years or moving something or whatever. Today a truck driver handed me a dime that he said was sitting outside my guard house window and it wasn't his.
What the...really? Now? First thing I did was text my parents. Maybe its something my dad needed to see or hear. He's hoping Monday he can go see his doctor to get a second opinion on yet another heart cath. But yea and on top of that I have my mother six months after a knee replacement. She's also in pain and depends on me to do things for her that she's suppose to be able to do herself. There's so much I want to do for me but when I wake up there is so much other stuff that needs to be done. Monday I'm hoping to finally start the Spark Solution. We'll see how this goes...I refuse to be defeated...