Friday, June 21, 2013
Ugh, this week has been so much, I'll condense it to a list:
Flat tire that we couldn't get off, $140 for new tire. (*SIGH*)
TERRIBLE days at work...just emotionally awful. Long story short, there are major language/cultural divides between me and two of my coworkers, and it's making things a little rough lately. That, and I think one of them is majorly afraid of change and rejecting me like a new organ...
Two 15-hour workdays between the two jobs...
Scale weighed me at 0.02 higher than before on Tuesday...and now is totally dead. Hafta replace the batteries. Which will be fun, with $140 less at my disposal... lol
But, good stuff:
I had my Couch-to-5k requirements (30 minutes of the prerequisite interval, 3 days per week) met by Wednesday...and I really do look forward to my run, every day. I think I'm going to bump it up to 5-6 days per week.
I brought lunch to work EVERY DAY this week, and we cooked at home for dinner all week, too!
I have my car back now, and she's fine... :-) Seriously, no bent rim or anything tragic, just the tire got sliced and the lugs were on too tight for us to take off manually...could've been so much worse!
I've met my water requirements EVERY DAY this week!!
I'm still reading 'Secrets of a Former Fat Girl' by Lisa Delaney...very, very interesting read. I really feel like she went through a similar battle with food and exercise, and even taking the break I did--she did that, too!! She gives great advice, and I feel seriously motivated by her...
One of her key pieces of advice is "INO"--"it's not an option". Don't feel like working out today? INO. Want to bury your face in a bowl of pasta the size of a baby? INO.
Another? Don't think about food as delicious yummy awesomeness (talk about an uphill climb for me, dude)--before you eat, think "what will this food do for me?" Will it satisfy you? Fill you with regret later? Blow your day? I think the main point there is THINK. THINK before cramming food in my face (novel, huh? LOL)!!
There's a fantastic quote in the last section of the book, which I started today: "...it was hard to do at first. I fought. I whined. But I could see it. Deep down I knew that I was fooling myself. Food wasn't fun. Food wasn't nurturing or comforting. It wasn't self-love. It wasn't other-love--not the way I used it. It was keeping me stuck in my "big boned" body, in my second-rate jobs, in my always-the-friend-never-the-gi
rlfriend love life. It was keeping me stuck in that comfortable place that I so wanted to escape."
It got me thinking--a year ago, a year and a half ago, even two years ago when I started this journey...it was all about taking a leap. And I leapt. It felt amazing...my bf commented recently that he misses that girl--the one who felt amazing about herself, who wanted to go dancing with friends and have a social life and write and be young and free. Lately, I've gotten caught up in being responsible, being serious, not having time or money or whatever.
I've said before that when I feel like I don't have control over my life, I was going to take over myself. Well, life, I'm taking the wheel. I've been working up to it for weeks, now--it's been increasing along with my running intervals. I've been struggling with stress eating, but I'm slowly making progress there, too.
I have a Post-it at my workstation that says "14"...that's how many pounds until I'm in the healthy BMI range for my height.
Find what drives you, right?