It's finally here.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
I have been waiting for this day for over 1 1/2 years. It is finally here and I am so worried. I haven't slept well all week. If I do not gain 100 pounds this week from the stress eating, it will be a surprise.
The ex & I currently have joint custody. Joint custody is not what most people think. It basically means that any decisions made regarding the children have to be made together. There are 4 big items that are specified in the agreement: medical, religion, education and I cannot remember the 4th right now. The ex is not one to compromise, one of the big reasons he is now an ex. In 2011 he brought my oldest son to the Dr. and had him put on ADHD medicine against my wishes. I found out about it because my son told me not because the ex did. Before this happened, my sons' counselor had told me that the arrangement we had put together for the children was not working for them. The ex & I basically wrote our own divorce up to save money. There have been many issues, I just did not want to turn into a person I am not and sue him for custody. I was trying to be civil. Well, I ended up doing it and it took 18 months to get the trial before the judge. It starts today and I am in knots.
It is the unknown that is eating me up. I am just praying for the best. I have my sons' counselor which is going to be a witness for me at the trial. She is excellent. It is had not to believe that a judge would not take her seriously. She is all about the kids. I am not a hugely religious person, however, I believe God pointed me in her direction. She has been a true lifesaver, especially to my youngest son.
I am hoping when this is over that I can get a fresh start in life. I start a new job on Monday and having this trial behind me after Friday I am looking to hopefully let a lot of old baggage go.
Right now, only time will tell.