Tuesday, June 18, 2013
What do you see when you look into a mirror?
Do you see yourself for the beauty God has given you and accept the things he thought were most grand about you??
Or do you see the lies someone planted in your mind with their small words??
I have had a love hate relationship with my mirror most my life....I have always known I was a pretty person and that is why I ate myself into a food mess thinking that the extra weight I had carried would scare people away so I wouldn't get hurt again by a man the way my dad abused me growing up...
But two years ago when my Mom died I realized its my time to start loving me, to forgive myself, to let go. I am still learning to love myself everyday. Sometimes it is very hard looking in the mirror because I get scared of who I am becoming because I might get hurt, but reality is. A smaller version can get hurt just as much as a larger and it took me a long time to realize that and its taken me a long time to realize that protecting myself from others hurting me made me miss out on a lot in life...
Losing weight was easy. Keeping it off is easy,but learning to truly love yourself is one of the hardest things I have done in my whole life.
I can tell you I'm a different person now that I was 2 years ago...im even a different person than i was 6 months ago...everyday im growing...for the better. and its a wonderful ride even with the bumps..detours...pee stops...road blocks...constructions...and the danger ahead signs because I know I'm exactly where God wants me to be and who he wants me to be...Right here and right now :)