Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.

    MYLADY4   44,654
40,000-49,999 SparkPoints
Non scale victory.....with a swim suit

Monday, June 17, 2013

We are heading out to Denver to visit the SIL and do a bunch of outdoor stuff this weekend for my 10th anniversary of my 30th birthday that will be here very very soon. She said to make sure that we bring swimsuits to spend some time down at the pool in her condo….eeeeekkkkkk. I did not have a decent suit. The one I used last year was for the 30+ pounds heavier me, and the one I got for a winter vaca just did not have enough support (my girls are so low they could be from National Geographic….hahaha). So swimsuit shopping I went.

With all of the work that I am trying to do mentally, this was going to be a challenge. I know that I have put on some weight since March. The therapist that I saw said that in order to be free from my extreme food control issues that I have to be ok with gaining weight and that it would be part of my healing from my eating disorder. This was the ultimate test of NOT being judgmental of what my body looks like and to not have the negative thoughts creep into the head. Sure, my thighs look like they were attached by the cottage cheese monster and the hips are so wide that I could probably carry three babies in there and it looks like one.

I detached from all of that negativitiness of not having the “ideal” of “perfect” body and went to find the best suit that I could for my current shape and I did. I found a really cute fuchsia tankini top with an underwire to keep the girls up and a black swim skirt. Would have I liked to have been able to get a real two piece, sure but I am ok with the body that I got, it is what it is. I will no longer “kill” myself to try and achieve something that is unrealistic for me.

I also found a really cute sundress to wear when we go to the Denver zoo. I just hope that the nude bike shorts that I ordered arrives in time. I HAVE to have shorts on under my skirts/dresses cause the inner thighs rub together and that it just not comfortable and they have since high school. Again nothing that I can really change short of lipo and don’t really want to do that but not ruling it out. Also seeing about what undergarment to wear on top, again, the girls need some support there.

Have a great day everyone.

Oh, I have to share this note that Robin W had posted, for ME, it just fits but I took it to the extreme but no more, I am DONE!!!!!

“You’ve been brainwashed to think being fat is a sin, food comes from the devil, and you must always be scared. Make sure that exercise as if its prayer, follow diet commandments as if they are sacred and obsess about weight to make sure that you are safe. The outcome – guilt and shame. How’s the diet cult working for you?”
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JT_GMOTU 6/24/2013 6:13PM

    Robin really just nails folks with her comments. I've found I have to swallow...and look to see where I have been deluding MYSELF in the areas she addresses...
Glad to see you have found some items that will work for you. And have a great birthday trip!

Report Inappropriate Comment
RUNNER4LIFE08 6/20/2013 8:21AM

    I love the dress and the swimsuit! I agree... I am not going to kill myself for that bikini body anymore. I have finally faced the facts that it is not an option for me. Plus, I have too many stretch marks from my kiddos.

Have fun in CO next week! That is the next trip I want to start planning soon. I hear it is beautiful out there!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FREEME1980 6/18/2013 12:21PM

    Thank you for the update regarding your progress.

Nice bathing suit (good choice - two pieces are great!). I like the skirt bottom.

emoticon & emoticon
Enjoy your celebrations!

Report Inappropriate Comment

  Great job finding what looks like a very cute suit! I have the same problem with the thighs.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CINDYTW 6/17/2013 7:59PM

  Wow, gotta love the irrelevant comments. Anyway, I am glad you are doing well combatting these issues. I can feel for you with the thigh issue, I almost always have that too! I have to be like 135# to get rid of that, and that is REALLY overreaching for me right now! I do the shorts or I found a chafing gel made by Monistat that WORKS. Its with all the itching creams and stuff. I carry it in my bag in case I have to reapply.

I like what your friend said, except that to me, sometimes a good run or hike IS prayer. I don't see anything wrong with that at all. It is not because of the calories burned or anything it is because I love being out in nature DOING.


Comment edited on: 6/17/2013 8:00:48 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
-LINDA_S 6/17/2013 4:28PM

    I'm glad to know the swim skirts aren't just for us old ladies! emoticon I've been looking for one that works for me.

Keep up the good work. I know it's very hard, but you can do it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KNYAGENYA 6/17/2013 3:33PM

    The clothes are adorable. Good luck with your journey.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYPOWELL1 6/17/2013 1:00PM

    Cute swim suit and good job on loving the "skin you're in", it's hard to be accepting of our bodies sometimes. Good for you in overcoming. Have a fun trip.

Report Inappropriate Comment
WOUBBIE 6/17/2013 12:49PM

    Those are really cute! Those colors will look awesome with your hair and skintones!

You're making so much progress in all the BEST ways. Sure, SparkPeople is mostly about weight loss, but it SHOULD be all about wellness, and that's what you're really focusing on. Your friend is very wise!

Report Inappropriate Comment
WALLINMW 6/17/2013 12:09PM

  Eat protein with every meal to curb hunger :)

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

Log in to post a comment.