Sunday, June 16, 2013
I sometimes don't get personal enough in my blogs. My loss of control started in my marriage. I just explained this to someone who blogged about her problems in hers right now and realized I could expound on my blog and show just where it all started with me.
I figured if my DH didn't do anything illegal or it wasn't too costly, I would let it go by the boards. Then I had balance and there wasn't that power struggle that goes on in so many marriages or relationships. But I didn't see just how much I was giving up of myself. There was no real communication in my marriage.
Then, he up and died nearly two years ago and what I experienced at the onset was a complete unrealistic position in which I found myself. I was overwhelmed, in a daze and felt disconnected, like I was in an out of body state. I was always a pretty independent person and in perfect control of myself. It took awhile for me to realize just how much of myself I had given up and how costly it had become - weightwise and my health. Along the way, had experienced a great deal of stress, so,in desperation, I realized I had been under a lot of stress for the 35 yrs. of my marriage, so I finally went to a chiropractor, almost as soon as I could after his death, because I knew I needed his kind of help!
What I am saying, too, is that a person like myself had to learn where I had started to lose "that control" to finish the picture. It helps along the road. . .