Saturday, June 15, 2013
PROVERBS31JULIA I realized in therapy a week or so ago that a reason why I turned to food for self-medication was because most 8-17 year old kids don't have access to bars and money to buy booze...liquor might be quicker, but candy was dandy, ice cream was on my team, and I could bake a cake without anyone knowing it was just gonna help me get stoned on the sugar and chocolate and caramelized butter!! I could huff it all day and no one knew why.
In the immortal and likely immoral words of Bob Dylan
"We would not be so all alone -
Everybody Must. Get. STONED!"
I could relate to that - even though I never did take drugs, legal or illegal.
It's really weird, reading these articles about how science has figured that food addiction is just as real as drugs, alcohol, etc. I have an acquaintance (not on SP) who is sort of trying to recover from various of her addictions, but I think she is only sober for a few weeks at a time. And here recently I was telling her about my struggles with food, and she suddenly starts telling me she would go do cocaine with me whenever I wanted. I'm thinking whaaaaat? Did she not hear me? (Probably not!) I don't have any desire to try the illegal stuff when I am still messed up with food addictions.
Being addicted to anything is not really good for a person (except for the possible argument of people who switch from drug/alcohol abuse to running or triathalon or similar events - and I am not even qualified to discuss that phenomena. I'd say it was good for them!!).
So anyway I'm still on this journey...
This article talks about being grounded and mentions various typed of events - in my case I'd say most of the time it is "intrusive memories" etc.
I'm tired! Need to go to sleep and focus on this later when rested.