Thursday, June 13, 2013
Lots of thoughts are running through my head. Unfortunately I'm typing this on my phone so I can't type as fast as m brain is thinking. I've been thinking a lot about church/faith and weight loss....the fine lines between depression/mental illness and just bad thinking. I've gone to church my entire life. Sometimes I can feel my depression in my body like you would feel a cold or the flu. It's weird. I know I should be thankful for what I have and I really truly am, but then that dark side pops up and variety of negative thoughts run through my brain. I don't know too many churches that discuss mental illnesses and God's faithfulness and trust. Especially since my son was diagnosed with Aspergers (and I have a feeling my youngest daughter might too) and me dealing with depression I have questions and concerns. I also have a soft spot for those type of people in our church. A lot is said about addictions (drugs, drinking, sex, etc.) but does anyone discuss addictions to food and emotional eating?
Also, I'm trying to get back on track with my eating and working out. I quit back when my work's Biggest Loser game ended. The one person I didn't want to win did. I know I should be happy for her but I'm not right now. I don't want to pay for that contest again but that did give me a little motivation. I was also dealing with some emotional crap: retention of my oldest, pre-k enrollment of my youngest, possible job transfer, summer school teaching, and my in-laws moving to the street behind us (me moving them to the
street behind us), plus the normal stress of my three kids and husband. My head is starting to hurt again. It's almost time for bed.
Does it ever get any easier? Eating healthy and working out. I started really trying back in January and it never really seemed like any of it got easier. I stayed committed to it for a while but it was a struggle everyday. Those that have lost the major amounts of weight (over 20) and have kept it off; does it get easier? Maybe I'm being too whiny and if so I apologize.
Thinking of you all in spark world and hoping things are going well for you!!!!