Wednesday, June 12, 2013
Stress is my killer.
I swear, I'll be one of those people who's totally healthy, but drops dead out of the blue from a stress-induced heart attack.
I'm 24 and have gray hairs starting, I have an anxiety disorder (depending on the day, it makes me want to curl up and go to sleep (not nap, more hibernation) or gives me heart palpitations and makes me feel like I have a cinderblock on my chest), I stress-eat, stress-smoked... Exercise is really helping me deal--I'm actually at work right now, daydreaming about hopping on the treadmill but knowing I really should wait a day and run tomorrow, and go with the stationary bike today... I think I need to incorporate some meditation, though.
My problem is...I have other people in my daily life. I love my bf, but he can REALLY put a cramp in my schedule, lol!! When I don't get enough sleep, it's usually from staying up with him (although I've been getting better about saying 'f you, I'm going to bed'); if I forego working out, it's usually because we went out to dinner or a movie...and with trying to spend time with him and our schedules being so opposite most of the time, I have very, VERY ltitle time to take care of my creative outlets...it's been months since I wrote a poem. I haven't actually finished a book this calendar year. I don't know how and when meditation will fit in there...
Oh, and my roommate is still being a huge jerk and ticking me off. Just figured I'd update everyone, lol!