Wednesday, June 12, 2013
This is the first item I am addressing in my determination to put an action on things in my life that do not serve me well and need to be permanently changed.
Since I am an emotional eater I realized that there were relationship in my life that triggered binges or depressing feeling or negative thoughts about myself.
This week I will review Luis Ruiz's Book, "The Four Agreements". Specifically one of the agreements is , DO NOT TAKE THINGS PERSONALLY. I remember reading it in the past and will revisit it and look further in depth the action attached to that statement.
I notice how men in particular are good at putting things in different boxes. For example I asked a man how he could cheat on his wife and go home at night and still look at his wife...he said one had nothing to do with the other that was his fun box. Well I don't concur but more men I quizzed did similar things with other things not cheatin, Bus,Chores,People.
What I got from that was when I am too emotionally invested in someone especially a very close friend of close family member I can see how hurt I get when they don't do their part in the relationship, invest any time to it, or care, so now I think I am devising a system.
For best friends who have radically fallen from grace they are now in my acquaintance box which demands from me different behavior and much less attention so less expectations which in turn produces less hurt and disappointment. I'm going to try it. For family similar but being they are closer I am also incorporating a LET GO AND LET GOD POLICY.
For close male relationships...I am rereading the book "HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU" a quick read but wonderful reminder of how men are from mars and women from Venus. If you get nothing from it you will laugh..written by a man. Very good hints of what not to do or accept.
That's enough emotionally for me for one week. Practice and Refining the theory I am sure will be needed.
Any added ideas or comments welcome this is work in progress.