Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Until yesterday, it hadn't really dawned on me before that I eat as a way to keep from thinking about killing myself. WOW! Interesting to see that I've been using food as a tool to stay safe - very skewed & counter-productive.
By February I had gotten down to 243 lbs (from 315 in 2011). But when I weighed in @ the doctor's office yesterday, I was @ 267 on her scale (260 on mine). +24 lbs in just 4 months is what made me realize that I was depressed - the weight gain vs actually being in touch w/ my emotions was my indicator. GOOD GRIEF!
Today I'll make an appointment to get back into counseling & see if I can get this turned around.