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Swimsuit Season - And Lots of Anxiety!

Monday, June 10, 2013

Spring and Summer give people - particularly us with "a few pounds to lose" - a LOT of anxiety. It's much easier to disguise unsightly rolls of fat under mountainous, shapeless sweaters than white t-shirts and shorts. And then if you want to wear a swimsuit, God help you.

When I lived in Hawaii, I was a teenager, and while I did have SOME anxiety about the swimsuit season, I could find something to fit in and wasn't so heavy that it was uncomfortable. But when I moved and I gained weight, things changed drastically. I didn't even bother to try on a swimsuit - I knew that nothing I found would look OK. I haven't worn a swimsuit in probably 10+ years!

But this year, I thought I'd give it a shot and buy my first adult swimsuit. I headed to Kohl's and picked out a few tankinis. Even when I was at my lowest weight (about 180 pounds), I would never have even DREAMED of a tankini/bikini. And while I still have belly flab, I thought it would be nice to try them on and see where I was.

I have tried on a lot of clothes in my day, but never have I been so nervous and anxious when trying on clothes! I'm not sure what it was - no, the tankinis didn't end up looking good on me (though they did NOT look as terrible as they might have last year!), but it wasn't that that made me so anxious. I think it was just that it had been so long, and there is so much drama involved in swimsuit shopping that I just overloaded.

I didn't end up buying a swimsuit that day, but that doesn't mean I've called it quits on swimsuit season. I think I just need to do some more research on what would be good with my body type and ease into the Swimsuit Dressing Room Drama.

Fact is while I may not have bought a swimsuit that day, I DID try one on, something I haven't even bothered to do (knowing I was overweight and wouldn't look good in one) in years. This is a big step - and if I can find a good swimsuit I like, maybe I'll have to take up swimming!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I have developed the "mature" attitude that I'm in the pool or at the beach/waterpark to have fun and I will never see any of those other people again anyway. So.....who cares what I look like as long as what legally needs to be covered is covered.

    Here's hoping you grab your towel and "noodle" and just enjoy the soothing sensation of lapping water.

    1590 days ago
    Totally get it. I have better success with suits made for swimming - the sportier brands. But the Lands End brand is very good also. Keep looking. Swimming is a great exercise & you deserve it!!
    1592 days ago
    my love of swimming and water parks is greater than my anxiety and shame of being in a swimsuit. I don't know how you could go ten years without being in the water! good for you for making the first step to getting back into the water!!

    emoticon emoticon
    1592 days ago
    I'm a big fan of the swimsuit at any size! Most of mine come from Lands End, whose sizes and fit I've always found very forgiving to my body. You can try them on at Sears to see if they work for you as well.

    If there are activities you enjoy doing that would require a swimsuit, please don't give up!
    1592 days ago
  • KACAR51
    TRAUMA!!! emoticon emoticon
    1592 days ago
    Thank you and you know you. But, please don't give up even this year. You might maybe out some were and just see one and it might be that one. But again you will know and you have to be the one that is happy. For me even when I was smaller, but after 2 kids I still felt just not right about some of the suits I found out. But 1 more thing no matter what (suit or no suit) You have been doing a great jod and your still losing! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1592 days ago
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