Day 6.9 Decisions
Sunday, June 09, 2013
Feeling blah today. Participated in an 8k run/walk race that I didn't train for, thinking I could walk it at least, and run a little bit. Turns out I was dead last in my age group, even with the running I did. I know I"m a slow walker, but.....wow. A little deflating. I felt good about at least going out and doing it at the time, since I was going to bail entirely--now I'm not so sure it was a good idea. Nothing like hammering home how NOT good at something I am.
Also--have to decide whether my trainer is worth the money anymore. Pros are that he gives me a level of accountability that I didn't have before; puts me in a good mood because I look forward to seeing him each week; and am learning. Cons? I'm dissatisfied with his way of tracking my progress (there IS no tracking other than my writing it down); it feels as though he has no interest in my improvement per se; inconsistent training schedule due to his personal life.
I know that I said I was flexible, but I did not mean 'blow me off for an entire week'. Maybe that's my own fault for being too accomodating though. Part of the issue is that I actually LIKE him, and look forward to the sessions almost more for the personal interaction. It's one hour, one day a week where someone who has a similar interest (weightlifting) gives me his undivided attention. I'm not really learning a lot of new stuff anymore--just re-doing the same things over and over. Which would be fine if we were following a program and he were pushing me, say, to up my PR on the bench press or lat pulldown or something.
So essentially, I'm paying someone $40+/hour to hang out with me once a week. And I know I should probably let that go--but it's hard to do so. I'll miss him. Back to being lonely Mar in the gym again. And I'm a little worried I'll lose my motivation with him gone.
I really need to make some gym friends. :( Unfortunately the people who go when I'm there already seem to have their little clique.
Or I could just take a training hiatus for the summer and see how I do on my own, without committing to a set path yet.
Why does the one truly enjoyable activity in my life right now have to muddied up by this shiite. Dammit.