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    MARIANNE9855   10,910
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why?

Sunday, June 09, 2013

No great insights today- just trying to push through my own self-sabotaging and eating to deal with emotional stress. I know better, I know what to say to everyone else and as a therapist to other people- I do it everyday and most people feel better because of our connection.
So why do I do the things I do- eat too much- spend too much and then feel like I am hiding the real me from people who depend on me.
Even as I say this-I know I am only human and not perfect. I don't even want to be perfect. Sometimes I just want my mind to be quieter-I want to have my trigger foods and eat a small portion and be satisfied but that isn't going to happen.
I guess if I didn't have some bad days I wouldn't appreciate the good ones.
Tomorrow or later today, I am going to try and stay busy so I don't have time to stay in this rut and then it will be Monday where it is a lot easier at work.
(Except for going to WWs monday night to weigh in which I do NOT want to do)

thanks again to all my spark friends and spark people in general- this place prevents me from going too far off the track so I don't give up.
I am going to keep working on "faking it until I make it" emoticon emoticon emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCFITZ2 6/9/2013 6:03PM

    I will be 69 years old in 1 week. My weight has been an issue since I was 2 years old.
I know the old advice, the new advice, the elation of losing, the shame of gaining. It is like a merry go round. Some times up some times down around and around and around. I won't give up because I am chasing a goal.
I assume you are also human and with all our knowledge, being able to practice what we know is sometimes very hard. Don't beat your self up. Love who you are on the inside. That does make the struggle easier to bear. emoticon emoticon

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TATTER3 6/9/2013 9:51AM

    We live...we experience...we learn...and we live better if we're wise. You're not alone. It's a day by day, step by step life...just keep Sparkin'...it will happen.

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DEBIGENE 6/9/2013 8:44AM

    Just a suggestion ...... spend the day today being busy making single serve snack packs. Use the snack zip lock bags and place SS size portions in each bag of things like nuts, dried fruit, cereal, pretzels, ect so you have a grab and go snack ready at all times. This saves money and time and if you must think of food today this may just be your diversion !!!

Don't beat yourself up just recognize your downfalls and make efforts to correct/change them. It takes time to change sweetie we have all been there and you will get there. Just stay strong and most of all stay POSITIVE and know that you can do this !!!

HUGS !!! emoticon emoticon

You're doing - emoticon

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FERRETLOVER1 6/9/2013 7:44AM

    Even though you know what to say to someone else, it's hard to say the same things to yourself. You know what to do - but you don't always do it. We all have been there and done that...just hang in there!

emoticon emoticon

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GAYLE-G-63 6/9/2013 12:47AM

    I understand how you feel. I have many days like this. No great insight either. But it always helps to know you're not alone. emoticon

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