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I will NOT let myself down.

Friday, June 07, 2013

Lately I have been having the feeling that I want to walk away from my life for a few days...let someone else be me and deal with my woea while I get to be carefree and problem free for a few days....wouldn't that be lovely?? Then I realize that everyone has their own problems. so I should try to figure out how to deal with mine.
One of my "problems" is that I LOVE food (who doesn't?)--especially carbs. I am also a stress eater, and this has come forefront in the last 9 months. How do I know that?? My spouse was working in Virginia until September, then he was fired (again) and moved back to Pittsburgh to find a job and live in the house where I live with my 2 kids, 2 dogs and 2 cats. It's weird how stress eating/weight gain/depression plays with your psyche. When I stress, I want the feeling of creamy yumminess in my mouth...french onion dip (chips are optional--not joking), nachos, mashed pototoes, Big Macs, ice cream. Do these foods make me feel better?? For about 30 seconds..then my mind snaps me into reality and I beat myself up for what I am doing,,,but CONTINUE to eat!! UGH
This was worse while on break from BLC...it was like my mind totally went on vacation and told my body that we will deal with the consequenses when BLC 22 started, which was this week, I am thankful for all these lovely ladies--and our newest member Matt for the support they have given me in the past, but I need to learn how to deal with this NOW.
My goals for this BLC is to post all my meals on my Sparkpage for all the word to see, Maybe I won;t eat it if I'm too embarressed to post it? I will blog everyday about my day and how I was able to overcome my stress eating by finding a diversion to the situation. BTW--I am very aware of the stressful thing in my life...notice it is a singular thing. I am in the process of getting rid of this,..just hitting some roadblocks. I am also going to incorperate more strength to my workouts and will add pilates, yoga and piyo to my routine. I am an Advocare distributor, so I see a 24 day challenge in my future, This will kick start my weight loss journey by incorperating a cleanse and 24 days of clean eating. I am also going to kick my running up as I am planning on participating in a 13.1 in Sept.
As for my "stressor".....I will get as far away from thism and when the cravings for creamy hit, I will reach for veggies and hummus (which I will measure out) instead of dip, listen to soothing music, or play a mindless game of pinball on my kindle. I will also reach out to my team for a quick hug,,,they are soooo good at that!
I can only count on myself for this journey, and I will not let myself down anymore emoticon
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