Thursday, June 06, 2013
Ever find yourself doing something the same old way and asking yourself, 'Why do I do this?' or find yourself thinking, 'Why do I think that its hard or that I don't want to workout or that I want to eat off plan? I mean, just why do I think that?' I was asking myself that this morning. I asked was I just engaging in procrastination? If so, why? Answer: because when I was little and some very bad stuff was going down, I would literally drag my feet to make the inevitable be a little farther away. It became a habit to want to not do the thing 'I had to do' or however I phrased it in my own head. Its not really true that I don't want to work more, do more workouts, do my yoga, eat right, or even eat calorie appropriately. I have done all the lazing around, skipping workouts, skipped yoga, ate poorly; you know what I got? I felt lousy. I don't feel better from all of that and even doing those tasks isn't so bad. Sometimes its just momentum or its just old habit, we do what we have done so we do it some more.
Well. I don't find the alternative to be that entertaining or that much better. Eating crap doesn't make me feel better. If it did, I would feel way better already. If it was going to work, I would feel better. You know what did make me feel better? Being lighter. Wearing smaller clothes. Wearing smaller shoes. Feet that felt good. Fitting in airline seats. Running a 7 min. mile. All of that felt good. Did it always feel good to run at 6 am? No, first mile is lousy. Eating under my calories doesn't always feel good; I always have that 'i'm a bit hungry' feeling. I always have my 'dementors' when I'm losing. But, I feel badly on my own anyway.
Might as well pick the weight loss pain since I'm going to be in pain anyway.