Thursday, June 06, 2013
Two years ago I started up again on SP. I had big goals and started out strong, like most people do. I was doing great, but lost my focus. I still logged in, still did minimal exercise, but started eating poorly again. Lots of fast food, lots of processed foods. All the things that have kept me stuck for so long.
Even though I had let quite a few old habits creep back in, I stuck with getting all my water in every day. I still logged in, spun the wheel and read articles.
I still have weeks, and sometimes a whole month where I don't do as well as I'd like. I still keep coming back. Each time I fall down, I learn something new.
Sometimes I'm a slow learner. Especially when that takes me outside of my comfort zone, which has been to stuff my emotions and eat. Lately all those articles, all those blogs and posts are starting to sink in.
Even with my setbacks, I've made a lot of progress in areas I didn't think were important to this journey. My mind is more open, and I've let go of a lot of emotional baggage that was keeping me stuck.
All of these little victories are adding up to bigger successes for me. Sometimes throughout the day I'll notice something and just stop to let it sink in.
Like this morning. I have been packing for our upcoming move. Yesterday I moved a queen sized mattress set down the stairs by myself (the kids were at school and I wanted it done!). I cleaned the garage, rode my bike, and later that night my daughter and I moved the mattress set out to the curb to be hauled off. Two years ago, even a year ago, this would have put me out for days. I was sore last night, but not so sore that I couldn't move. I was tired, but a good tired. After a rest break, I was able to get up and do more packing and cleaning.
I expected to wake up extremely sore and tired, my mind had already retreated back to my old way of thinking that I had overextended my energy and wouldn't be able to do anything the next day. I was wrong! I fell asleep earlier than normal, got a wonderful night's sleep and woke up with a ton of energy. My legs are still a little sore, but nothing that can't be stretched out.
This is why I keep logging in, drinking my water, and keep working on eating better, even if the weight isn't coming off. Because two years ago I would have given the day up for lost and laid around all day. I wouldn't have had the energy to do all the things I did yesterday. I wouldn't be strong enough to haul mattresses, dressers and boxes all day long.
I'm physically and mentally stronger than I was two years ago. I'm tougher, and happier. I don't groan about doing physical activity.
I still have a way to go, but every I'm loving the surprises of feeling good every day.