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Coming out of the blackness of hell

Wednesday, June 05, 2013

Nine deaths in four months.
Having a super tight budget.
Having a body that is hurting more than ever.
Having run short on funds for everything,
Including basic repairs - replacing lights, fixing
A toilets, replacing a broken door handle.
Huge car repair bills after so many errands during the last months
And a squirrel who decided to build a nest in my engine, who chewed wires.
Running late on my infusion and cutting corners by not taking all my meds.
It is a hell that just never seems to stop.

Quite frankly it is a hell added to by people repeatedly using me past what was acceptable.

I'm really mad and tired. There are a few key people that have assisted me while living in this hole.
But overall and on balance people are still asking me to do more.

I came to my senses today with a little help. Need to stop taking care of others and focus on myself.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SAL1512
    So sorry that this is happening to you. I want to lift your spirits. I wish that there was really a way to do that. My prayers have headed your way, many times. You have done well and taken care of a lot of "stuff" these past few months. Many have benefited from you. I pray that some one notices that the CARETAKER needs to have her needs addressed NOW !!! You have a good head on your shoulders . . .
    Sally emoticon
    1723 days ago
  • LEVERB66
    Saying a prayer for you!
    1724 days ago
    Yes you do. Take care of yourself first. emoticon
    1724 days ago
    1725 days ago
  • PAG2809
    Yes, that is what you need to do. You can't fight this physical stuff and take care of everyone else at the same time. Its time for others to help you. Relationships that only work in one direction are never healthy., though sometimes they need to go in one direction for a while when things are rough for one person. I'm so glad that you see that that person is you. I wish I could be there to help, but we're both going to have to settle for virtual hugs. Know that I'm here for you and wishing I could be there for you... emoticon
    1725 days ago
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