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    ASBLOWRY   8,836
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In a rut....

Wednesday, June 05, 2013

I feel like a broken record.....always griping/writing about my unhappy marriage but never doing anything about it. Why can't I just leave? Why can't I just tell him I've had enough and want out? I am soooo unhappy and I know he is too. We've talked about it so many times but neither of us make the first move to actually end things. We've talked about counseling but honestly, I don't think it would help. Our issue is just plain incompatibility. I don't think that can be repaired with any amount of counseling.
I am so tired of this being the focus of my life. Life is too short. I feel like I'm holding myself back from living, from living the life I was meant to live.
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FRENCHSEAMS 6/5/2013 8:26PM

    Even if counseling doesn't "save" your marriage, it can help you both work out what you want to do.

Best wishes to you in this difficult decision. I'm divorced. Best decision I ever made. My ex regrets it, but he was living in a fantasy world. I'm really not the person he imagines he used to have. He wouldn't even like me if he actually knew me.

What can you do?

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CAPECODBABE 6/5/2013 9:15AM

    My husband and I had a great 25 year marriage, then about a 4 year marriage of living together with no connection and since he moved out almost 3 years ago we are best friends. We never had one fight and are both happy,

I have no romantic feelings for him. He's a great guy, but like you, our lives just aren't compatible. I had 3 kids, I didn't need a 4th LOL

Best thing we ever did.

Don't rush into anything - But do what will make you happy.

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SNS1968 6/5/2013 8:09AM

    Forgive me for butting in. Of course I don't know anything about you or your husband except what was written here. But I think everyone deserves to be happy, that includes both of you.
You say you've talked about counseling, but you haven't tried it. The fact that you're still together indicates to me that you're both still interested in the marriage, even if only a little.
I really urge you to try marriage counseling. A lot of times the resentments build up and you can't talk to your partner about what's bothering you. A counselor can help you with that. Honestly, you won't know until you try. Yes, I'm speaking from personal experience.
I wish you and your husband the best.

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