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    XANGELSTEARZX   33,756
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Working to better everything...

Saturday, June 01, 2013

That's the goal this month...not just my weight, but my state of mind, my comfort level, and my home. The yard has had flowers planted and it starting to look beautiful and the garden is growing nicely so now it's time to turn more in-ward.

I go through bouts of depression that seem to be brought on by the fact that some days I H-A-T-E my little home and due to the circumstances in my life I spend 85% of my time at home. I do not deal well with change so I'm extremely overwhelmed at the idea of making drastic changes to it this month but some of them are not really optional. My husband is almost completely dependent on his wheelchair and he needs to be able to move independently in his own home for his peace of mind. It's a major concern to me that he is unable to do that and I find it unacceptable so change will be made whether I like it or not!

So, our home is a VERY small trailer. We have done our best given my husband's disabilities to maintain it and also improve it. Unfortunately...old trailers tend to fall apart even with some love.

The bedroom set is being moved to the old living room and the bedroom will now be his new office area and I am making the living room out of what he was trying to use for his office but isn't a good location for it because we added a covered deck that we were given and now everyone congregates in his space...so LOTS of furniture re-arranging but, that's the easiest part of everything that is needing done.

The doorways are being widened enough to allow his chair through. As it's been the bathroom door is too narrow and he often needs help through it and that's heartbreaking...you shouldn't have to ask for help to use your own bathroom.

There is some work that needs done primarily with the bathroom and plumbing. Ewwww plumbing especially potty plumbing and it just so happens that is what must be fixed! I also found an awesome steal on a jacuzzi tub and bought it so new bath tub that is both awesome and will be therapeutic. But, it is taller and wider than what is currently in our bathroom so the wall needs moved over a bit and the tub will need framed in and dropped down lower in the floor to allow him access in and out.

Why is all this such a mental blight for me? Because, my Dad and I will be doing all this ourselves. Why would anyone in their right mind do all this themselves? Because we are essentially dirt poor and that is how you get things done...by becoming a redneck general contractor. I've scored almost all the materials for free so might as well use them. While I'm very capable of learning and have great guidance from my husband sitting on the side lines it's also intimidating. A lot of serious work needs done that consists of things I haven't really done before. I also can't even begin to come to terms with the crazy amount of change this will be all at once. I'm a little scared but, a little excited too. Maybe it will make me happier and more comfortable. It will greatly improve hubby's comfort because he will gain his own space and more independence.
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DEERLADY45 6/4/2013 8:12AM

    I know just what you are going thru! I was my brothers caregiver for many years and for a while we lived in a mobile home and he could barely get thru the door ways! It is hard for them to watch us have to brave it all and they can no longer help! We finally sold my mom,s house after she passed and bought a new manufactured home with 36 in door ways and a roll in shower ! he couldnt walk at all. He had M.S. We was lucky that we could get something bigger! Im so sorry for you, but it makes you stronger in the long run but sometimes you just want to crawl in a hole for a while! I used to leave him for a while and go take a walk to the woods and i had a special log i sat on and connected with the Creator and connecting just really made all the difference in my life! My brother was my Hero passed a way 2 yrs a go from a blood in fection and miss him every day but sometimes feel his presence hear on the property! he was my hero for sure... Blessings and Hugs to you! Bonnie ( Is there any organizations that could help you! Check it out!) emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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XANGELSTEARZX 6/2/2013 10:11AM

    If we had an actually house there are loads of agencies that will help with renovations for Independent Living but, once you mention..."Yes, we own our trailer" we fail to qualify. I tried looking around for that first...because I'm sure it'll turn out just fine but, for my luck I'll have a crooked wall or something lol.

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BECCAZEN7 6/2/2013 5:09AM

    Wow, that sounds like a lot of work! You are a brave woman! I guess you do what you have to though! I stay far away from plumbing - it kinda scares me plus I wouldn't know what I was doing. Hopefully your dad has knowledge of that.
It is really essential that your hubby get around the place in his wheelchair - are there agencies that can help you with the work to make your place more accessable for him - for free? I don't know but it's a thought.
I wish you luck in all the improvements.
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Becca
Missourians! Team

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