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Fat Talk

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

There is an interesting article in the New York Times about women and the ritualistic "fat talk" that we engage in.

"Over winter break, Carolyn Bates, a college senior, and a friend each picked out five pairs of jeans at a Gap store in Indianapolis and eagerly tried them on. But the growing silence in their separate fitting rooms was telling. At last, one friend called out, “Dang it, these fit everywhere but my thighs! I wish my legs weren’t so huge.” The response: “My pair is way too long. I need to be taller or skinnier!” "

(rest of article here:

Like a lot of us, I am guilty of this as well. I pass myself in a mirror and comment on now my body is shaped like a Russian peasant woman. Or I bemoan my flabby upper arms.

My best friend doesn't tolerate this. Her response is always the same, "Why would you say that? Quick tell me ten things you love about your body!"

My list always starts with my rack, which I get to count as two. emoticon And then my big green eyes, and my long red hair, and then I get stuck. Right now with my IT Band injury, I have trouble talking positively about my legs, but usually I am ok with them. They're big, but nicely shaped, and they take me where I need to go. My wrists are surprisingly delicate, and my nose is pretty straight and even.

It usually takes a while, but she never lets me off the hook, and in the end I can find some things to praise about myself.

So, what about you? If you've read this far, leave a comment, and tell me something you love about your body.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    And I really love your friend. She is a keeper!
    OK, I don't know if I can come up with ten, but here goes: my eyes(2), my hands(2), my hair (sometimes), my skin (sometimes), my feet (I think they're cute), my nose (it's cute too). Eight it is. I used to love my shoulders and legs when they were strong, and I have no doubt that I'll love them again.
    emoticon for posting!!!
    1722 days ago
    my blue eyes, my nose and my shapely legs.. i have smallish wrists too! feels good to talk this way instead.. love our bodies, love ourselves!
    1723 days ago
    We do tend to do that, don't we?

    Okay - I have great legs. Long (for my height) and shapely and trim. Plus strong! (The physical trainer at the gym told me men would follow me anywhere for my calves, LOL!)

    Rack is okay. Tush is okay. Graceful hands of an artist. Lovely skin, very peaches and cream. And beautiful eyes.

    (That's 10, if I count 2 boobs, 2 legs, 2 hands, 2 eyes, skin & tush)
    1725 days ago
    My waist. It gives me curves.
    1725 days ago
    Great encouragement & thank you!!

    God bless,

    1726 days ago
  • DR1939
    My legs
    1726 days ago
    Excellent blog! I'm guilty of this talk too - every day. My husband tells me I'm too hard on myself and my daughter tells me I look so much better that I once did, and in all the wisdom of a 14 year old, how I'm less fat than so many other people - gotta love her for trying.

    My list . . .

    I like my lips and eyes. I have good skin. That's easy.

    My body . . . I have nice boobs. I'm curvy - I like that. My calves are pretty shapely.

    1726 days ago
  • 3016DEBRA
    Wow... I saw a segment on the Today Show this morning talking about this. OK, so I like my face shape, my hair, my feet, my ankles, my wrists, lips, green eyes, butt shape, boobs & last but not least, my neck.
    Didn't think I was gonna make it! That's not easy... emoticon
    1726 days ago
    Misfraki! - Thanks for the chuckles!
    Lulu - this is a great conversation starter and helped me to set a new goal.... to think positively about my body's CURRENT state.

    My best body part today is my lower legs. They are shaping up nicely, as a result of my workouts. Its a bit of a surprise because I had long considered that the fitness work was only for health benefits because the shape of my skin and muscles were destroyed from being so overweight. Now I recognize that there may be hope for some of my other distorted body parts. Time will tell... I will continue to workout regardless of the physical results.

    1726 days ago
    Love your blog! It's not just a young woman's game (lol) at 63 I have good reason to find true flaws with my body (oh , for the day s when I thought my thighs were huge , yet I only weighed 105 lbs. ) Today, I still have full and luscious lips, but other than than, gravity has claimed the rest. But you know what, I'm just grateful that everything still works. So, here's my Top 10:

    #10: full lips (notice best feature becomes last priority)
    #9: still have my own hair
    #8: eyes ok~ can still see facial hair to remove it
    #7: gray hair has come in nicely ~ not too coarse
    #6: no replacements~still have my own hips, knees, shoulders
    #5: legs have not failed me~ I can walk backwards with my eyes shut
    #4: my arms don't dip into the gravy when I reach across the table
    #3: hips are still below my waist and above my knees
    #2: thighs make great pillows for grandkids watching TV
    ....drum roll......#1! all needed plumbing works, unneeded has been removed~

    Hope this gave you a chuckle, I remember well the body issues of a younger woman (me) PS You have a GREAT best friend, but you know that already! emoticon
    1726 days ago
  • KEELIE21
    Great article and great post!
    I am a fan of my face in general, body is tougher but I'd have to say my bum!
    1726 days ago
    I love my face shape and cheek bones!

    And, as much as I complain about losing weight from the top down, I love that, with 70+ lbs to go, I can see my collar bones.

    I love how easily my body puts on muscle and/or definition.

    I love being so strong, my roommate calls me a Tora-saurus. Being super strong comes in handy for things like buying charcoal for cookouts and moving books.

    I love my hair! It's super thick and holds just about any shape I give it. And I never get split ends!

    1726 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/29/2013 2:24:22 PM
    I love my lips! I also like my eyes, my boobs, my hips and my skin! Thanks for the reminder to praise myself, I'm feeling pretty good now! emoticon
    1726 days ago
  • MUFFIY831
    I saw that article too, and am very guilty of the same. Did you ever watch the British version of 'What Not To Wear'? They are/were really good about addressing underlying body issues that sometimes made people choose their wardrobes. They'd strip the woman down to her underwear and stand in front of the mirror with her and force her to look at her body, sometimes even comparing their own bodies to hers, like 'hey, look, I have a flabby stomach too, but I cover it up and voila, I look great!' I thought it was really powerful stuff, but of course Americans are so uptight we'd never do that. Anyway, as to your question - I always start with my rack, too! :)
    1726 days ago
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