Sometimes I Actually Do Stuff
Monday, May 27, 2013
I've definitely been struggling with mood lately. At first I thought it was just a particularly long and bad run of PMS (I definitely notice a change in my spirits for 4-5 days a month) but even after that fiiiinally 'broke' I still felt irritated and headachey and tired all day. I've increased my vitamin B and iron intake and am trying hard to get more sleep (although I generally get my 8 hours plus some). I also have a few stress-reduction items on the go in hopes of improving things. I really miss the energy and joy I felt a couple of weeks ago, and I feel fortunate that I still have enough clarity to want to work to get that back.
So my sparkcoach challenge today was to write down three recent accomplishments that make me feel good... it wasn't hard to think of them, which is nice even of itself, and part of the challenge was to put them into a blog entry. I feel a bit awkward about this, but I suppose in general my feelings about writing things for this blog include mostly the following options:
1. If I write about accomplishments I feel like I'm bragging and being obnoxious.
2. If I write about challenges or failures I feel like I'm complaining and being negative.
3. If I write about anything else I feel like I'm being boring.
I take comfort in the fact that nobody is being forced to read this, and despite the list above I do actually enjoy this more than I thought I would. It feels like light creative practice and an opportunity to reflect on things in a clearer and more retrievable way than keeping the thoughts in my head provides.
(She says as she rambles on about things that weren't the point of today's entry.)
So here is some bragging about what I've accomplished recently!
1. I've been tracking my food and exercise on here for almost three months, and I've been very dedicated about it. I didn't think I'd last three weeks, and I still feel energized and motivated to keep logging everything, even when I haven't made good choices. I'm going on vacation next week and I plan to come back here when I return and read this for a reminder of why I need to start up again right away. FUTURE ME: Take heed! You are a *much* happier and healthier lady when you're paying attention to what you eat and how much you exercise.
2. I had a really fun band rehearsal on the weekend and I sang my first song as a lead vocalist. It has taken me an embarrassing number of years to get up the confidence to sing in front of these guys. I sounded a little nervous (voice, why must you be so telling?) but overall it was not too bad and I have to say I'm pretty proud of getting through it. Singing is something I've always wanted to be able to do but have had a huge, paralyzing anxiety about. I credit my weight loss with part of the boost in my confidence (I believe confidence begets confidence as anxiety begets anxiety). Someday maybe I'll be able to perform for an audience ;)
3. I bought a condo about a month ago. I managed to save the money and work out how much I'll need each month for payments and savings, and I feel pretty good about where things sit. I even had enough left after the closing costs to buy some furniture (my lower back loves me so much right now). I've also been saving money because of the healthier eating (smaller portions and fewer rich meals and snacks) so that has been helping me meet this goal as well.
So there you go. Here's hoping success also begets success.