Friday, May 24, 2013
I have a friend that we have been talking on and off for over 9 months now. We met through a mutual friend. He lived over 140 miles from me. Now he's in the process of moving back to Houston. Yet, he's still 30 miles away, on the other side of town.
We have been speaking more this week... He convinced me that we should meet in a public place and chat... He chooses a karaoke bar... I don't dance or do karaoke. I feel nerveous... I'm still not feeling well from the meds (doc prescribed) that gave me a really bad dry cough... Yet, he still wants to meet me, sickness and all...
In a way, I'm glad to be going out and getting away from the drama of my household. I still am hesitant to open my heart and let someone, anyone for that matter, in.
My fear is...
what happens if we don't click?
what happens if I feel nothing towards him??
what happens if we do hit it off???
what happens if this is more than I can handle????
I'm afraid to let someone in... Going through a loss of a husband... It changes you. As much as you want comfort in someone being there; you're afraid of betraying the memory (and vows) you made with the love of your life...