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Is it wrong to ask others to keep my "secret?" :(

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Yesterday was a rough day. :( I was hungry a LOT...this liquid diet may be starting to get to me.
I ended up over in my calories (I'm supposed to be on 1000) and I was over 1300 yesterday. (This is in order to shrink my liver for surgery next week.) I'm so paranoid that I won't do well enough and they'll sew me back up and reschedule the surgery. I think I'm worried too much about it, but I can't help it. I'm a worrywart!

Yesterday, I also taste tested 2 more of the unjury protein shakes, the strawberry and the unflavored. The strawberry was ok, nothing to write home about, but was tolerable, but I put the unflavored in tomato juice and it did alter the flavor a little and I just didn't like it. Maybe it'd be ok in a soup or something (but it can't be heated over 140 degrees) but I don't want to waste a soup if I screw it up with the unflavored..lol I already ordered a tub of the chocolate that I like and that should be here today.

Last night I went to my niece's concert (a bunch of 3rd graders playing recorders...fun times, man, fun times...lol) She was super duper cute though. Love her to pieces! Anyway, my uncle is visiting from out of state and he was there. Now, I'm not telling anyone really about my surgery except immediate family and a few friends (I don't really have many real life family or friends on here, if that makes sense..lol...so I'm not worried about it getting out that way.) Anyway, I'm not going to lie about it, but I'd rather not bring it up before, maybe after and if they ask I'll be honest, but I know there are some family members who are very back-stabby and like to gossip and will definitely see this as the easy way out or will have a ton of negative comments about it and I just don't want to hear all that baloney. So, it's easier to not say anything at this time.

So, my uncle doesn't know, I could just SEE my mom stressing the whole time worried that she'll say something wrong and it'll come out...lol I'm going to talk to her today and let her know, IF it accidentally slips or something, it's no big deal..I'll just deal with it. We're also planning a picnic for Memorial Day and since my uncle is visiting and I know mom's already stressing about the food and me...lol See where I get my worrywarting from? lol I told her, just plan as usual, I'll just come a little late so I miss most of the food part...then we'll visit and have fun, no biggie.

Sometimes I think it'd just be easier to just announce it to the whole world, but then I think, if I do that, there's no turning back from everyone under the sun knowing and EVERYONE wants to give their 2 cents, even if they have no knowledge in it at all. I'd rather not deal with that, but I do feel bad making my family kind of keep my "secret"..ya know? sigh...don't know what to do.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    My mother had gastric bypass 6 years ago and STILL hasn't told a lot of people what she did. A lot of people aren't supportive or look at it like you've cheated which is really crap since those people have no idea what it takes to lose weight in most cases let alone what you give up to have these surgeries. I am working towards my weight loss the old fashioned way because my insurance will only pay for half of surgery and I simply cannot afford to pay for the other half. I would get approved because of health history and problems but it's just not something I can swing with 5 kids and one income.
    Who you tell or don't tell is YOUR business. Do what you want to do.
    1724 days ago
    Hey, you have to do whatever you are comfortable with -- after all, it is your business first and foremost, and your choice who you tell. A few years ago we had to deal with a difficult situation and chose to tell very few people, and while it was sometimes tough to hide when emotions were running high, I don't regret the decision because it was the right one for us. You have to know the people closest to you and what kind of attention you are ready to handle, and it sounds like you do. Keep us posted!
    1758 days ago
    I am also struggling with this question. I am scheduled for my first clinic appointment & information session on the 29th so far I have told my brother & my foster sister but I don’t want the whole world judging me for my decision. Most of them have no idea what I have gone through in the years I have been over weight, so how can they judge if I am making the correct decision now. Many people who discuss weight loss surgery seem to think it is an easy way out. There is often such a huge negative reaction from people when it is discussed that I think it would be best to just wait & see what the reactions are to the weight loss. I like the response one person in the group had, if asked just say you had abdominal surgery & don’t go into a lot of details. And if they ask about the weight loss or your diet just tell them your doctor has put you on a new diet.
    1758 days ago
    no need to worry people if it is not neccesary. as long as you tell a few people that can be supportive is all you need.
    1759 days ago
    Hi Mindy-
    I was very selective with who I told pre-surgery, as it turned out I had ton more support than I expected.
    Also I've been working through finding a palatable protein. I found New Whey liquid protein in 4 oz containers and they are working well for me!
    Hang in there on the pre surgery shakes.
    1759 days ago
  • 23KAIYA
    1760 days ago
    I was very honest and up front with everyone from day 1. I said this is what I am doing, you can either support me or not, either way that is your choice.

    I was really surprised at the support I did get. It was pretty amazing! A lot of people I thought would be negative were actually positive and supportive (at least to my face)

    best of luck!!
    1760 days ago
    My husband 'outed' me, and the good part is that he also fields most of the questions. It is better if everybody knows. They will get over it soon enough.
    It is your body, and your life. You have enough to deal with as it is with this liquid diet. So you do what you have to.
    But it will come out in the end, and having kept quiet about it would just make it more embarrassing.
    (I remember this girl at the gym who had surgery and kept quiet about it. Her amazing weightloss just made me feel like more of a failure.)
    1760 days ago
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