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    ANNIEONLI   43,882
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Fear

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Fear can be debilitating.

You stand there... thinking.

You know you should do something... act out... but you can't.

Instead of moving forward, you take the whole situtation, crumbling it up into a tiny wad, and shove it back into your pocket, where you secretly hope it will be forgotten about, or fall out of your pocket, or even better, it will just get destroyed in the wash.

But it doesn't...it's still there in some form, even after the wash.

After the wash, sometimes it stays whole, just a little morphed, but most of the time, it breaks up into undistinguishable little pieces, but now it's all over everything else... onto your favorite thing, like little tiny blobs of goo that even the dryer won't be able to sort out.

Getting it back together is hopeless at this point... it's time to chuck the whole lot.

And just think, if you actually took the fear out of your pocket - faced it head on right there and then... well, you'd have something completely new in your hand instead of a useless ruined thing.

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Here are my 2 worst fears:

1) I have not put in my name or my story into Spark Success Stories "officially" because I am scared. Scared that I will gain the weight back and be a hippocrite in my own eyes once I do that. The same goes for the National Weight Control Registry and a recent survery I was sent by the Maintenance Group. I don't want to jinx anything...silly,I know, but there it is.

2) I am scared to put into words several businesses plans because every time I have said something to someone - the "devil's advocates" come out and all I need is support, the pros, the "you can do it, that's a great idea!"... not the cons. I don't need the cons right now. The cons will come in time - and get ironed out in time...that's part of the learning process. I know I have said stuff and failed before too (really, that is what bothers me the most - I bite off way more than I can chew and then crash and burn) but then again, I started Spark without support, without homefront fanfare - I can be successful at this too if I just try and believe in myself... If I just get brave and set attainable goals.

There it is - I need to be brave. I need to face the fear. I did it before, I can do it again. I cannot let fear hold me back.

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So what is your fear...what is holding you back?

PS A friend on FB just posted this...had to share
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REBECCATKD 5/22/2013 11:17AM

    Maintenance is hard work, too. When you decide to submit your story, perhaps you can alleviate your fears by admitting that it's not over; it's never over. A healthy, fit lifestyle requires dedication and commitment (just like a healthy marriage!) You could inspire many people by including your thoughts on maintenance because, unfortunately, many of us lose weight, gain it right back, and then give up. Your maintenance is a HUGE part of your success story!!

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GOLOPTIOUS 5/22/2013 11:06AM

    You're a success story to me whether you put your name and story anywhere. You are one of my motivators. And you know what? Even if you were to gain weight back I know that you would never give up on yourself and you'd keep improving and that in itself is a success.



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KANOE10 5/22/2013 8:55AM

    Behind the fear, there is the fear of failure. I am trying to accept myself as not being perfect in weight maintenance. I joined the National Registry to define myself as a maintainer and to hopefully give input to study maintenance. Half of the people on the registry are trying to lose up pounds. Obviously lots of people are not perfect.

You are right about facing the fear and acting on it, being the way to go. You have shown such strength in your life, maintaining your weight all of these years. I know you will figure out this business fear..and find yourself where you want to be.

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DWEXCEL 5/22/2013 7:06AM

    It's funny, (but not funny ha ha), but you just don't seem like a person to be paralyzed by fear. You are always so strong and positive, that is just doesn't seem possible that you would be a "real person" and have fear(s) just like real people do.

I totally relate to your metaphorically story describing fear. One thing I do know is that, all that CRAP that we put ourselves through WORRYING about and STRESSING about the issue is 9 out of 10 times much worse than the issue turns out to be.......Just think about that

Now I know "That's easy for me to say".......as I am one who even though I know it, I still worry and stress and make things worse by doing that. And sometimes, I just go....OMG.....that was it.....that's all there was to it.....after I've put myself through the wringer sometimes for days!!!!

But, at any rate, We know you are a strong woman who has come a very long way! You have tremendous support, and from what I've read about you, you have it at home now too!

So, wouldn't it be better to just meet your fear HEAD-ON.....get it over with, and use all that worry/stress energy right then.....rather than letting it eat you alive.

Well, I hope I will take my own advise too! But you can do this Girl!!!! You can do anything!!!

Love you, my Friend!

And, BTW....."Don't ever let Anyone (or Anything) Dull your Spark"!!!!! emoticon emoticon

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DALID414 5/21/2013 10:31PM

    Currently my fear is my boss leaving to Israel and leaving me 'in charge' of the business he started. I didn't sign up to be in charge, I wanted to start at the bottom of the food chain and mill around there for a bit. emoticon I'm not ready for a real grown up job.

Here's me being your pro: emoticon

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KRISKECK 5/21/2013 1:59PM

    One of my favorite recent blog posts is entitled "Avoiding fear by indulging in our fear of fear" . It was written by Seth Godin, and his premise is that we paralyze ourselves by not facing the things that we are afraid will inspire fear in us. "Every day, we make a thousand little compromises, avoid opportunities, actions and people, all so that we can stay away from the emotion of fear." Not staying away from the things we fear, but from the very emotion. I think that's so true for so many of us, and so limiting. I printed it out and hung it on the wall and am trying to face the emotion of fear when I feel it in the vicinity. Your blog reminded me of that. Thanks!

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NUOVAELLE 5/21/2013 1:40PM

    Fear of failure.
Fear of letting ourselves down.
Fear of failing in the eyes of the people in our lives.
No matter how you call it, it's always the same fear. And it's rooted deep inside us since our early childhood - at least in my case. And we can really find the strength inside us to overcome it. And someone who believes in us and is always there to remind us of what we've achieved is a great help.
I believe in you, Annie. And I know you'll face your fears. Because if you think about it, that's what you've been doing successfully for a long time. You just never took the last tiny step towards proving it to yourself.
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