Sunday, May 19, 2013
This week has been an emotional one. For some reason my emotions are all over the place and I don't like it. I've been trying to figure out why but I got nothing. It seems as though my emotional state has effected my eating habits, although I'm eating healthy, I find myself eating more than usual and eating even when I'm not hungry. This has me feeling depressed and hopeless. Truthfully, I feel like I'm losing control and its making me feel like crap.
My biggest fear is gaining the weight back. I have to get my emotions in check otherwise it will be the death of me. Suicidal thoughts are slowly returning just at the thought of being 300lbs and in a size 26 again. I know, that's probably stupid and sounds weak but I'm being honest.
I didn't lose any weight this week, I'm not surprised because TOM is approaching and I never really lose during that magical time.
I'm just trying to keep my eyes on the prize and that is healthy living, being happy and depression free, loving myself and being a great example for my toddler and preschooler daughters.
This week goals;
Tackle this emotional demon
Prep my meals
Drink all my water
Smile more and cry less
Keep working out before work (I find it helps my mood)
PRAY PRAY PRAY!
Here's to another week.