150,000-199,999 SparkPoints 193,662

My Stars Must Be Misaligned

Friday, May 17, 2013

I don't know what I did to upset someone, but it seems like nothing is going right. We all know about my aunt's funeral that I didn't know about. Of course, facing a second epidural doesn't thrill me, but if the Celebrex helps, maybe the 2nd epidural will.

Yesterday, I decided to go and ride. My back has been better the last couple of days and I have a really busy weekend so I decided it was beautiful out and a great day to spend time in the saddle. The barn didn't go so good. I walked in and noticed something was wrong with JC. He wasn't eating. With JC, that is a huge red flag. He usually has everything gone within 20 minutes. He was colicking again. I walked him for 50 minutes which was pretty good exercise in dirt with a horse. At least this time, we didn't have to call the vet. All he needed was a mouthful of medicine and, within 30 minutes , his eyes were bright again and he was himself. He wasn't too thrilled to see me leave with his carrots.

I also need to mention that when I arrived, I saw an Illinois license plate. I knew it was my sister. She was in for my aunt's funeral which no one told me about. Mimi has two horses retired where JC is. My husband wanted to turn around, but I said absolutely not. I am not going to let her run me away. I didn't do anything to them. I walked in and said hi to the farrier who was there. I noticed one of the owners was in the barn which is unusual at that time of the day, but her daughter, who usually runs it, is off until Tuesday so Carrie worries. She was talking to my sister.

I noticed JC wasn't right and called Carrie over. I left to walk JC. My husband went back to his stall to get my phone and I noticed my sister talking to him. I couldn't believe after everything she had the gall to speak to him or him to her. He told me that she just said, "My horse colicks all the time." I need to remember how narcissistic Mimi is. Whatever happens to you or one of your pets, she has had it ten times worse.

All I kept thinking to myself is what a gutless human being. She let my brother do all the speaking and doesn't even have the guts to face me. I was willing her to come in the ring. The only thing she did was shout out asking if I wanted her to walk JC. Excuse me. Really! Are you f'ing kidding me. You can't speak to me in close to a year, you can't call me when our aunt passes away, you let our brother come to my house demanding everything that is my mother's and all you can ask me is if I want you to walk JC? Huh? What planet does she live on. I said no and kept walking.

I am proud of myself however. I didn't get angry or stressed. Normally, in a situation like this, I would find myself shaking, but I didn't. I just didn't care. She chose to be nothing in my life and she is nothing in my life.

I am sorry. I am not a hypocrite. I don't play games. I could not go through all I have been through with her and then act like we are best buds. NO not in this lifetime. She made her choices and she can live with them!

Well, maybe I have had my three fer. With JC alone, 2 colicks and an abscess, we should be done.

Things have to get better.

I will throw in a positive. I did get relist of a property I had last night and the dogs are doing great together!
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    hugs to you for being strong and not letting her get to you.
    bizi emoticon
    1766 days ago
    Keep the faith. You're right--things will get better. Hang in :)
    1766 days ago
    Well, I'm glad you got the relisting..

    I had a similar mom who would listen to my complaints about people and say "consider the source" and I do believe she's right. Narcissism is a personality disorder that people often don't have any insight into or control over. Even professionals say it's hard to treat. It is horrible and stressful to have any type of relationship with such people, but much of the behavior isn't intentional but more a lack of personal development.

    1767 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/19/2013 7:48:00 PM
    Some people just aren't happy unless they are raining havoc on another. Siblings seem to be especially good at this. Makes me happy sometimes I'm a 'lonely only'...sometimes.

    I hope that some day you and your sister can realize that the stupid hateful things that she has aimed toward you only boomerang and fling dirt back in her face double time!

    I also am so happy that you didn't back down and let her intimidate you the way that she seems to have been able to in the past.

    As far as I can's her loss!

    Hugs and happy JC is better...I'm sure he misses his momma and was so happy that you came to be with him.

    That's the whole problem with a horse...I'd want to move it right into my house and tuck it in each night! emoticon emoticon
    1767 days ago
  • JUSTME29
    I'm sorry JC wasn't doing well, but I'm glad you were there and able to address the problem immediately before it got worse.

    I won't even mention your sister because she doesn't deserve a mention. Well, I guess I did huh? Just goes to show how invasive some people can be.
    1768 days ago
    Stay strong and focused! You handled it correctly.
    1768 days ago
    emoticon Things will get better emoticon
    1768 days ago
    I'm sorry things were a bit hinky, but life tends to go that way. I blame it on that Murphy idiot and his law.

    As to your sister, when I was a child my very wise mother used to often remind me to consider the source when I couldn't make sense of another person's bad behavior or meanness. That advice continues to serve me. The responsibility for what your sister or brother (or anyone else, for that matter) chooses to do or the way they decide to behave is neither your fault nor your responsibility. If they are over 5 years old and have not the brains nor the class nor the courtesy you expect, that's on them. Same with your children - you can teach them when they are young, but as they age and become individuals if they choose to ignore or violate those teachings, that is not your doing.

    Yes, it stinks that people can be so mean and thoughtless and manipulating and manipulated and cruel and generous and kind and hateful and all the other stuff. Unfortunately, you and I can't make it so that all those negative human aspects suddenly vanish.

    Breathe deeply and be glad JC wasn't too bad and you could walk it off. Let your sister have no more of your time or energy than she deserves and/or earns. If that is ZERO - so be it. Life is way too short to intentionally waste any of it on people who diminish your joy and happiness.
    1768 days ago
    1768 days ago
    Things will get better, Nina! I just know it! JC is such a sweetheart, so sorry he had to go through colic, that is why I always keep a vial of Banamine in my horse ER kit! Usually 10 cc's of that, IV into a 1,000 pound horse, and they are as good as new! Usually give at the rate of 1cc per 100 lbs, though I rarely have given more than 10 cc's, even in a horse over 1000 lbs. Glad that he is better, whatever you used must have worked.

    You did the right thing in dealing with your sister. Like you said she is nothing to you anymore and I don't blame you for that. She acted like a cowardly vulture and all you can do is pray for her! Just treat her like a stranger with respect and nothing negative. Good for you! emoticon emoticon
    1768 days ago
    Sorry to hear about your problems with your sis. My sister Judy did not speak to me for 10 years & I have yet to know what I did that pissed her off-lol! That is family for you! So glad to hear JC is OK!
    1768 days ago
    1768 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by LASARRE