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    MARYLAMOOGAN   1,975
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No.... No no no no no..... I am such a failure


Friday, May 17, 2013

Never before. Never before in my life have I been this much. I'm not saying that I'm severely overweight. But look. I was supposed to be at 119 lbs by now. I was going from 130 to 110. I had gotten down to 124 at one point. And now look at me... I had to restart my goals. Because in a matter of three weeks. I gained 8 POUNDS.... I am going to cry. Now instead of having a fit and ready body by the beginning of summer, I'll be lucky if I get there by August 3rd.
I'm working out. I've been doing crossfit. But not the terrible heavy lifting kill yourself and get huge muscles crossfit. Just the bootcamp. A lot of pushups box jumps pull ups running you name it. Granted I've only done it a couple times, but I'm still doing it.
Look, I think this whole workout thing is actually blowing back up right into my face, as well as my stomach, thighs, butt and arms. Since I'm working out and in the mindset of working out, and since I'm now at home for the summer with any food I want in 5 feet of distance from me, I'm hungrier, and therefore am eating more. Much more apparently, than I should be eating. But I can't help it! Working out makes me hungry, and since I'm hungry and am in the mindset of "Oh, I've been working out! This isn't bad for me because I need the carbs/protein for my workout" I have as a result gained much more than what I was ever wanting. At the beginning of the year when I wasn't even trying to lose anything at all? I lost 10 pounds. Now? I've gained 10.
I'm going on a run... We'll see if I can try to kickstart this all back and I can lose some weight... Overall though at this point I'm just kind of devastated. Severely devastated in fact... Sigh... Wish me luck... Here we go again.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARYLAMOOGAN 5/19/2013 12:12AM

    Thanks everyone for the comments, advice, words of encouragement. I'm not going to give up and every bit of reminders and encouragement helps! I'm gonna take all of these words to heart an do my best to follow my goals and be healthier and better about all of this! emoticon

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DJ4HEALTH 5/17/2013 9:10PM

    Just keep going and you will see that it will work for you!!

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HISANGEL721 5/17/2013 2:13PM

    You can do this! It is very hard to read your body in the beginning, especially when training hard. When I first started doing the ZCUT workouts, I felt ravenous! I had to remind myself that I could eat things - after a workout - that were filling and only in 100 calorie portions. This helped me account for the hunger after my workouts but didn't spoil my day's diet work. I especially love to eat nuts after a workout! Packed full of protein, eat them in 100 calorie increments with a glass of water and your hunger will be gone :)

Just keep at it. You can do this! My weight loss didn't work for me the first... third... fifth.. I don't even know how many times I've started and stopped! But, all I know is that I feel better when I try :) I failed big time at the beginning of this month. I put on weight when I should be getting all fit and toned because it is my second month of ZCUT. In one week, I turned it around! Sure, I'm a little tired. I've been hitting my workouts hard.. sure, correcting my eating is challenging... but it is worth it! I'm worth it! In about a week, I've corrected my previous mistakes and I'm looking to weigh in lower than what I weighed two weeks ago!

Go hard, eat clean, and stay positive! We're all here for you :)
Shannon

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BIXASTARR 5/17/2013 12:38PM

    Head up! You can do this, and even if you can't get it done as soon as you wanted, the important thing is that you are getting it done. Keep a smile on your face and a positive outlook, because being negative and down yourself will make this much harder on you!

You're beautiful, smart, and healthy. You're gonna reach your goal because you want it and you're willing to work for it! You got this!

Just remember to log your food eaten, and don't be afraid of workouts. Women don't get huge gross muscles from strength training unless they're on hgh (steroids). That's a mean and discouraging myth. Strength training will make your muscles firm and tone your body. As an added bonus: stronger muscles burn more calories :)

You can do this, please don't be so hard on yourself. Smile and remember how awesome you are!

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KNYAGENYA 5/17/2013 12:29PM

    Everything will be ok. There are tons of reasons why weight changes. It could be you aren't getting enough water, TOM, building muscle or even stress. It will come back off. I had a water weight gain for 2 weeks in a row and it finally came off today. Plan your foods. I make menus of what I am going to eat every day. This helps me. I would also suggest a hobby that keeps your hands busy. I knit so my hands stay busy and I am not tempted to go to the fridge to see what is in there. You can do this. I have faith in you.

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JESSERMOVICK 5/17/2013 12:27PM

    since you know you are so hungry after workout, I found that the protein powders in a juice work wonders to curb hunger. Maybe try that. I know how hard it is to avoid the "hey you worked out! go have a snack as a treat" frame of mind.

Planning food out is a great idea, using the food tracker after each meal maybe? So you can see your progress and know that you can't have the extra food? emoticon

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SQUIRRELLYONE 5/17/2013 11:32AM

    Start planning your food! Trust me, it will help!

You can fill up with good for you foods that don't have a lot of calories, and then really enjoy the "bad" foods you choose to eat :)

I eat a lot of blended soups
http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/
recipe-detail.asp?recipe=246204
1
http://recipes.sparkpeople
.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=2
426116
http://recipes.sparkp
eople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=2226876 (my favourite)

and I always have a 4-cup salad (kale, spinach, tomatoes, peppers, and snap peas) with my lunch to help carry me through!

Keep at it! As your body acclimatizes to all the work you're making it do, you'll be less hungry!

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STODD251 5/17/2013 11:20AM

    Don't be so down on yourself. Sometimes when you start working out you do put on weight because you're building muscle. I gained 10 pounds when I first started working out and then lost it again when I decided to get serious about the nutrition aspect as well. As far as the hunger issue, you should try to find foods that are more filling to power your workouts rather than just eating whatever because "it's okay, I'm working out." I have found that starting my days with protein and eating plenty of fruit, as well as keeping hydrated have been keys to staying full and focused throughout the day, even when I am doing some hardcore working out. There is no reason to be devastated. Take it as a lesson. Now you can start trying to figure out what does work for you.

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