Thursday, May 16, 2013
It's been a long time since I've logged in. I got tired of needing to enter information for every recipe, so I stopped recording foods all together. Work got super-stressful in the past few months, so I stopped even visiting SP. I got depressed, and stopped having any interest in cooking. I stopped writing in my blog, and so all of the depressed and negative thoughts I had just built up.
Long story short: I've gained a lot of the weight I lost since November back again, and I've fallen into bad habits (mindless eating, emotional eating, skipping exercise). The pants I have that were loose 2 months ago are tight again. Super discouraging. :(
I'm better than this, though. Things at work may be unclear, but I don't need to wallow in my anxiety about the future, that only makes it worse. I deserve to take time to take care of myself and my needs, and those of my family. It's past time to get back into good habits. I know it will be easy for me to feel overwhelmed and want to stop again, so I'm just going to work on three small goals at a time, and try to worry less about losing weight and more about just being healthier. Once I can complete a goal for the week or day without thinking about it, I'll add a new goal to the list.
1. Record at least 80% of my meals here. Trying to record every little thing becomes stressful if I can't figure out how to record something I ate at restaurant or something a friend made for me. It's better to record most of what I eat than to quit because I can't be perfect.
2. Empty my water bottle at least 1x/day. I always feel better when I drink more water, but I tend to ignore my water bottle outside of meals.
3. Don't eat when I'm not hungry. To start, this will just be trying not to start eating if I'm not actually hungry. I grew up with the rule that I always had to clean my plate, so it's hard for me to tell when I'm full, especially with the strong compulsion to keep eating if there's food on my plate. I need to get back in touch with my body's signals about when it's full, but again, I need to start small.
I'm also going to try to make at least one healthier choice each day (order a smaller portion than normal, skip the soda at meal out, add an extra veggie to dinner---even if it's from the freezer, etc). Baby steps is the name of the game!
I CAN do this! I lost this weight before, I can lose it and get back into shape again.