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Wednesday, May 15, 2013

When I sit on the bus in the traffic, going to the gym on weekdays, I often muse about life, the universe and everything. Yesterday, looking at the other people on the bus, and the ones driving past in their cars, it struck me what an ugly lot, by and large, the human race is!

Too thin, too fat, lumpy noses, flabby arms.... the list is endless.

I find this deeply reassuring.

Yet nearly all of these people, with their myriad imperfections, have found someone else, with their own imperfections, to love them. Parents, siblings, spouse, children....

I find that deeply reassuring too.

So why is it, that we can never see in ourselves that which our loved ones see in us?

Why do I look in the mirror and see ‘fat’ not ‘voluptuous’? See the muffin top, but not the blemish free smooth skin? See the turkey neck, not the smile above it.

Perhaps we should practice looking in the mirror, and seeing what others see, not what we think they see. We all have some good bits. Shiny hair, or nice teeth, or elegant fingers.

Concentrate on them.

I wonder if it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. That, no matter what our weight, or our reality, if we BELIEVE we’re ugly, that’s what we project, and that’s what we become. Partly because our dour, non smiling faces, heighten and reinforce that image, partly because we are convinced that we’re ugly on the inside too.

We all have imperfections, that’s what makes us human, and external beauty doesn’t always equal happiness, so don’t obsess over the bits that make us human.

Remember that beauty really is only skin deep.

Beauty Is in the eye of the beholder.


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
KENSHO 5/29/2013 4:49PM

    You really have a way with words. I like your way! This blog made me laugh...and tear up a bit too. It's so honest.

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JIBBIE49 5/26/2013 12:26AM

    Have a great day.

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SHELLYBABE2 5/23/2013 2:20PM

    emoticon blog, wow inspiring blog! TFS, this is definitely a good one to copy and paste for motivation when it's needed! Brilliant insight!


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1SALMON1 5/23/2013 12:56AM

    Thank you for encouraging us to have an attitude of loving kindness towards ourselves. This is something I'm trying to learn...

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STFRENCH 5/21/2013 7:28AM

    Loving this blog! xx

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DANAPRIME 5/20/2013 8:35PM

    WOW! How profound! Great advise, and from a Hitch Hiker fan as well! emoticon

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PINKANGEL73 5/20/2013 11:40AM

    You are so right. The imperfections of the human race are very comforting. How incredibly boring the world would be if everyone was physically beautiful and perfect. People who are very beautiful and know it tend not to have to try very hard to make friends or be nice to others and to me that makes them far less attractive.

I feel very fortunate that my parents brought me up to appreciate knowledge, kindness and friendship far more than material goods or physical beauty. But also that it was a matter of self respect to make an effort to be well presented, polite and friendly. If I did that I was good enough to meet anyone and go anywhere. That was a greater gift than anything money could buy.

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    Great advice and a great thing to keep in mind! Thank you for sharing.

emoticon emoticon

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1BEACHWALKER 5/19/2013 2:54PM

    I know what you mean, I do that too sometimes. Trying to look in the mirror and not see imperfections or look at others in that way too. I think we are trained that way, from childhood. The fashion industry who use the gorgeous models make most of us feel way inferior too! A smile lights up every face and when you are happy and it shines through, everyone is beautiful!! So keep smiling! And be happy!! emoticon emoticon

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JOYB19 5/19/2013 1:03AM

    I used to be so insecure I had to practice accepting compliments gracefully. The most interesting people are those who have the strength to lay aside insecurities and make their mark in the world, in spite of imperfections. Cool post - thanks!!!

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FALLNTENN 5/18/2013 5:20PM

    Great blog. What you wrote is so true. It sure has me doing a lot of thinking about how I view myself.

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ASPENHUGGER 5/18/2013 3:15PM

    I do that too -- look at people, notice their imperfections, & then wonder how it is they managed to get into & stay in a relationship, when I can't. I get the noticing part from my mother: the first thing she ever noticed about anybody was what was wrong with them. In the 8th grade, she wanted me to not be friends with a girl only because she had big thighs. I've tried hard to break that habit, but while I'm not as bad as I used to be, I'm certainly not there yet.

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MRYTYLER 5/17/2013 3:21PM

    I think I am going to cry. What a wonderful blog. It made my day. Thank you

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MARUKI52 5/17/2013 3:12PM

    Thank you for reminding us that we are all amazing in our own way.

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REGILIEH 5/17/2013 2:35PM

    emoticon emoticon

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WATERDIAMONDS 5/16/2013 9:49AM

    The idea that we might look into the mirror to see what those who love us see is novel and intriguing. I'm going to try it right now!


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PATRICIAAK 5/15/2013 11:23PM

    We are all made in the image of God - How can you get more beautiful than that?

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CATHEMARIE 5/15/2013 10:17PM

    emoticon emoticon

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MARIANNE9855 5/15/2013 9:23PM

    Great blog and so good of you to share your wisdom and observations with us. We are so much more than our size. I work with mentally I'll adults who often can barely pull themselves together but there is beauty in each one if you take the time to look. emoticon

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DOVESEYES 5/15/2013 7:35PM

    Yes I agree for me it is a constant battle...

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ALIHIKES 5/15/2013 4:28PM

    I agree that we each need to celebrate the positive in our appearance and in our bodies. It drives me nuts when my beautiful friends complain about fat rolls or pouch belly -- when all I see are lovely smiles and sparkling eyes.

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JUNEAU2010 5/15/2013 4:06PM

    My current self talk is that I am a deeply flawed human being (and some other choice comments that I dare not type!). How can I get from where I am to where your blog moves my heart? I need to work on this!

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LADY_MARIANA 5/15/2013 2:47PM

    Thank you for a wonderful post!

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CATLADY52 5/15/2013 12:06PM

    Thank you for the moment of clarity. It's too bad that we can't see ourselves from a different viewpoint more often. emoticon

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DR1939 5/15/2013 10:23AM

    Deep thoughts for a bus ride.

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GOANNA2 5/15/2013 10:22AM

    Thank you! Remember, we are voluptuous. emoticon

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COCK-ROBIN 5/15/2013 10:16AM


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NEW-CAZ 5/15/2013 9:38AM

    well said! emoticon emoticon

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KIMBERLYJA1 5/15/2013 9:36AM

    Totally. It is so important to work at valuing ourselves--to turn our criticisms of ourselves around, and to try to appreciate what we have. This is easier said than done, of course, but I have discovered in these last few weeks that it is possible. And when it happens, it is a revelation. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us!

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LEANNAW4 5/15/2013 9:23AM

    Well said! Thank you!

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ALEXANDRIA2007 5/15/2013 9:23AM

    This is so true! Change your negatives into a positive! Wonderful, wonderful, blog post!

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    Well said !!!
The age old question, why are never happy, at least for long, with who we are, where we are... the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence (until you get there)

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SWEETNEEY 5/15/2013 8:38AM

    For Real

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AUDREYANNDEDE 5/15/2013 8:33AM

    Exactly! My vlog this week was just about self-image. It doesn't matter if you lose 20-40-60 pounds, you won't like your body unless you start today.

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