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late funnies

Monday, May 13, 2013

"A new study found that women think men holding a guitar are more attractive, even if they are not playing it. In a related story, guys with an accordion will die alone." -Jimmy Fallon

"NASA is taking applications for people who want to live on Mars. Now here are the requirements: You have to be between the ages of 18 and 40 and insane." -David Letterman

"Giant African land snails have been found in Florida and Texas. If you're in Houston and you see a giant snail coming toward you, walk slowly for your life." -Jimmy Kimmel
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