Thursday, May 09, 2013
Me, yesterday afternoon: “La la la la… wooo hoo hooo, doot de doo”
Boyfriend: “What’s put you in such a good mood?”
Me, stopping to notice I’ve been singing as I put on my gym clothes: “Whoa… uh, I guess I’m looking forward to running on the treadmill?”
When did THAT happen?
I have been trying to stick to my sparkpeople diet plan and regularly exercising since March 3rd. I have officially lost 18 pounds, and am down about two dress sizes. I’ve lost five inches from my waist. I can run/walk two miles on an inclined treadmill in under 30 minutes. I fit into clothes I haven’t been able to wear in over a year.
All of these accomplishments make me happy when I think about them. But the best part is that they make me happy even when I *don’t* think about them. The best thing that’s happened to me in the last two months is that I am happy walking to work, and I am happy running into people I haven’t seen in awhile, and I am happy picking out clothes in the morning, and I am happy being able to take a seat next to someone on the bus.
I think I used to spend a lot of my day feeling like people were looking at me and thinking mean things. Things like, “look at that fat girl eating that ice cream, so sad.” I can’t say I’m totally ‘cured’ of negative thoughts (not by a long shot) but the biggest difference is that now I mentally respond with, “oh really? You think I shouldn’t be eating this frozen yogurt? Guess what—it’s part of my plan, and my plan has helped me lose 18 pounds in the last two months.” Even when I’m not having imaginary conversations I notice I walk taller and am more inclined to interact with people. I feel proud most of the time, instead of ashamed.
This is not the end of my road—it’s not even the half-way point—but I’m so encouraged when I see how far I’ve already travelled, and feel the sun shining on me as I walk.