Thursday, May 09, 2013
I got a frantic call from my father yesterday informing me that he knew that he would most probably die before my mother did and that if I didn't "make amends" with my mother, that I would most probably see nothing when he died from my mother since she is revengeful.
He told me that he had never encountered anyone as revengeful as her (as if I didn't know that?????) and that my sister and I had better start having a relationship with her or never see a penny when he dies since she will most probably be spiteful to us and leave it to charity.
Well in the middle of all this, I am dealing with a very scary medical condition and not once was I asked about it. I simply told him that I was not interested in their money and knew that I would never see it and wasn't interested in having a relationship with a narcissistic person like my mother.
I am mentally stronger having walked away from her and her hurtful/revengeful tirades towards me (that I have always endured even as a child) and I told him that he had decided to stay with her and deal with her abuse, but that I had no interest in it anymore as I was an adult and didn't have to put up with it like I did as a child.
Honestly, it is all because he is being abused beyond words by her that he called me and my sister about this and wants the fire off of him and on us instead. I'm not, nor will I ever be interested in a relationship with her because it took me this long to realize that she was narcissistic and would never love or care about me or my children.
She lives only to hurt me and I refuse to live my life with that around me. My husband was dragged into it and I was told that she told my father that my husband said that he (my father) was stupid. Seriously? She's such a liar as well as an abuser because he hasn't talked or been around her since 2011 when they visited the day before my surgery.
In the midst of this turmoil I am finding that my symptoms are getting worse than they were a few days ago and I had a stupid leg cramp around 3:30 this morning that is still hurting.
I am so tired of this stupid drama and told my father that it was one of the reasons I walked away from my mother and sister (who acts so much like my mother it is scary). I have no use for people in my life who live to hurt you and get pleasure from it and create drama.
So not only am I dealing with physical issues, I have to keep dealing with emotional ones too. My father kept reminding me that Sunday is Mother's Day and I asked him what his point was about that.
Despite all that she has done to me, I always send her something for her birthday and for Mother's Day, but beginning to wonder why I do. I am having a hard time figuring out if I should cut every single tie and not even do that because no matter what I do (leave her alone since it was obvious what she wanted) I don't win. If I am around her, she abuses me and ignores my children (who have no connection to her at all).
I stay away from her and yet still can't get away from her control and fury, but made it clear that I had zero interest in their money and will and that I would be fine without the threat that was given to me. Seriously, I can't be bought with money and my family and my emotional well-being can't be bought with money by a conniving, abusive narcissistic family member.