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Long time in coming...

Monday, May 06, 2013

I knew this day was coming. I had been thinking about it and planning for it. Getting on the scale this morning confirmed it.

This is the day I stop being a whiner and start taking responsibility.

I get that the past six months have been more stressful than usual (hence my absence on SP). My husband has been in his final semester of school and working overtime, which threw my routine out of whack. I fell into bad habits of going on 5 hours of sleep a night, not planning meals, and putting everyone else's needs before my own. I've been feeling like a hamster on a wheel -- frantically running, but not really making any progress. But, you know, everyone has stressors in life. They can't be used to absolve oneself of responsibility.

I'm glad that I am still 24 lbs down from my highest weight when I started up seriously with SP last July, but the reality is that I am 22.5 lbs higher than the lowest I had gotten using SP. Not a good thing.

Like I said earlier, I knew this day was coming. I have been feeling increasingly sluggish and out of control. I knew why it was happening -- functioning on auto-pilot never bears good results. That was a (stupid) choice I elected to make, and the consequences have been clear.

Could I have done things differently? Of course. Undoubtedly, there are others who have endured far more stressful situations than I did and are more successful at staying the course. That's not to say that I am comparing myself to others (because we know how pointless that is), but I refuse to make allowances for the choices I have made over the past six months.

So this is the plan of action thus far:

1. Retake control of the meal planning and grocery shopping. My husband has tried to share responsibility for these activities because he doesn't want it to all fall on me, but it just doesn't work. Meal decisions start happening haphazardly, food that wasn't on the grocery list somehow makes it into the house, and going out to eat happens more often. Cutting off the possibility of this happening is the first step.

2. Track my food. I had gotten lazy about this, I'll admit. But I know that tracking is a good thing because I'm able to objectively see what I've had and what I should have for the rest of the day to ensure that my eating is balanced and within my calorie limits.

3. Exercise. Another thing I have gotten lazy about. There really is no excuse. I have all the resources I need to do things right in my own house. I simply let inertia win. I'm also planning to enlist my daughter in motivating me to move (a role she'll be eager to take on since she is a skinny thing with tons of energy!)

4. Sleep! Burning the midnight oil doesn't do me any favors. Getting more sleep will allow me to be more efficient with everything I do during the day. One way I am working to combat the "Just one more thing" temptation is to have daily to-do lists. When I think of something, instead of rushing to do it, I put it on the to-do list for the next day. It can wait.

I re-read the saying on my Sparkpage wallpaper, and I want to include it here since you can't read it with everything covering it:

STOP making up excuses.
STOP saying that you'll do it tomorrow.
STOP believing it will happen by itself.
BEGIN working out today.
BEGIN eating healthy today.
BEGIN your life change now.
and be proud tomorrow.

I want to be proud tomorrow.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Melissa, this is a wonderful turning point for you. I know how easy it is to let our circumstances absolve us of our responsibility to ourselves. It isn't anything we can entrust to anyone else. No one is going to make sure we take care of ourselves but us. I'm still struggling to get my horse under control. It seems to be running out of control at a gallop still. Luckily, the habits I formed over the past year and a half have kept me generally within my own lane, instead of diving head first off the precipice. Remember, those small steps that seem like they don't make much difference are the key to the whole shebang.

    Glad to see you're back!
    1713 days ago
    Good luck in your weight loss journey!
    1738 days ago
    Yay! Welcome back!!
    1748 days ago
    I always like to read that someone is getting back on track. This is a long journey for most of us and we continue to learn about ourselves.

    My favorite saying is "fall seven times, get up eight"

    My other favorite saying is "never, never, never give up"

    1748 days ago
  • _BABE_
    Been there. Over Xmas I regained 20 pounds I wanted gone forever. Good news it will come off too and we are here for you!
    1749 days ago
    It happens, but it sounds like you have a great plan to recover. You can do this!
    1749 days ago
    Happy you're back!
    You can make it happen!
    1749 days ago
    Good for you!!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1749 days ago
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