100,000-149,999 SparkPoints 100,174

Not interested in Sparkpeople functioning as Facebook...

Sunday, May 05, 2013

I am not.
What's that about you say?
I'll tell you.
I have been doing a lot of thinking about how I can finally succeed in meeting my goal of getting rid of these last 20-30 pounds. I have been reading my old blogs and my activity feed. I have been looking over my food and exercise logs. I have redone my Sparkpage in preparation for my next challenge.
Something occurred to me that has always been there in the back of my mind. It is even something that has been on my Sparkpage since Day 1!
Here it is...

We sit at home on our computers and collect friends.
Occasionally we comment on their status. "WTG!" "Great job!" "Well done!" ...or just some emoticon.
Sometimes when people comment on my status or blog I am not even sure if they really read it. Just like facebook - only a few of those facebook friends really care to watch the video you posted of your kids school presentation or piano solo... The others just pretend they watched and say things like, "Wow! What a talent!" or just "like" it. Why do we collect friends who don't really care?

This is not why I love Sparkpeople... and I do love Sparkpeople!
I love the connections I have made with truly supportive friends. You guys are AWESOME!!!
... BUT... I find that more than half the time I accept a friend request, that "friend" never shows up again. No blog comments. No feed support.
Why bother being a "friend" then?
I don't get it.
I am weaning myself of all those "friends" today. I have no interest in keeping up with your feed and your blogs and offering my support and time if you will not do the same.
This may sound harsh, but the fact is that I am here to meet my own goals and to support people in meeting theirs.
When I have too many friends on my feed I can't give the support I really want to those who are equally supportive to me and to others! I am truly here on a mission and I need to only surround myself with other like-minded people. When I don't it makes it much more difficult for me to succeed.

I wish all of you absolute success in all your efforts. Sending lots of good vibes and wishes your way. Please don't be insulted by anything I have said, but I really need to utilize this site as a tool for my own success and not simply as a social networking tool.
I never liked those....

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I periodically perform a sparkfriend purge. If we don't interact, then what is the point? I'm not here to collect virtual friends. There is no prize for having the most sparkfriends. I'm all for keeping it down to the core group that is reciprocal in support.
    1626 days ago
    You have a very valid point.
    1628 days ago
    I've recently started looking at my friend page, too, and have been pondering similar things. Maybe it is something similar to what you are doing that will help me feel less "stressed" when I log into Spark
    1628 days ago
    I pick and choose my friends. I have been on SP for quite a while and I don't have a huge list of friends. Some have left SP, but the ones who are still here are pretty supportive. I don't collect friends for the sake of having a huge list.
    1628 days ago
    I totally understand where you are coming from.. emoticon
    1628 days ago
    I've only been here a few weeks and I've already culled my friends list a bit - I try to make a point to get around to everybody at least once a week. It can be a lot of work some days when there are lots of posts/comments. I like that you've given yourself permission to do what's needful for you. emoticon emoticon
    1628 days ago
    I too have been more selective of late with adding people. I think SP is a great forum and there are supportive people out there, but it should go both ways.

    1628 days ago
  • DAWN14163
    I think you make a very valid point....
    1629 days ago
  • PICKIE98
    I do not belong to any social media,. so do not know how FB works, but I would never have time in my life to sit and look at virtual friends. Life is too short. I think sometimes sparkies get all hepped up and mean well, but then do not follow up on people that they "friended".

    If we look at this site as we look at a business, it makes sense. Why advertise, give out samples to those who will never be back or support you in your business. On the other hand, I have personally met a lot of my Sparkfriends and had lots of fun with them. It is like other things in our life,, timing is everything..
    I hope you continue to share your life with us, even if we are not your friends,, so to speak!! That part is not necessary, but people like you motivate people like me,, we never know how our words or actions affect others.. thank you for sharing these thoughts!
    1629 days ago
    Thanks for crystallizing my thinking about Spark and Facebook. I automatically add people as friends who ask and I have been rethinking that. I would very much like to edit my friends list here to those I seem to stay in contact with, but I don't want to hurt the feelings of those I edit out?
    1629 days ago
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