Love this part. :)
Sunday, May 05, 2013
It's been several weeks since I last saw my brother, and when he saw me yesterday, he asked, "Have you lost weight?" :) I Love it. I have lost about 10 lbs or so, and didn't really figure anyone could tell. 10 lbs when you are 120+ lbs overweight is not that noticeable, I don't think. I Did ask him if he'd talk to mom, thinking she might have told him I was trying to lose weight, but they both said no, they hadn't talked about it. I also had a colleague note a day or two ago that she can tell I am losing, but I think that may have been out of politeness because of the way the conversation was going. But, I had a friend once tell me about a quote she had read by someone, saying that "women lose weight like butter melting," meaning from the top down, basically. And, for me, that is the case as I always lose weight in my face, then breasts, then waist, stomach and hips. So, it doesn't actually take long for people to notice that I've lost weight as it's noticeable in my face first. Still, whether it was the clothes I was wearing (I liked the way the shirt that I was wearing hung on me, as I felt it was pretty flattering), or politeness, or what, it seems as though I can now assume this weight loss is real. I can assume it's not hormones, water weight or other causes, and can believe that my efforts in eating healthier are actually paying off! This is so exciting and motivating! I had this realization this morning when I woke up that soon, I'll have lost 15 lbs. While that seems rather obvious, I just don't think I believed I could get that far. I've lost 10-ish pounds a million times, but 15? Nope. AND, if I can lose 15 pounds, what's to stop me from losing 20, 30, 50, 100, and 122 pounds!?
I remember last time when I lost all the weight (about 8 years ago, I lost 70 lbs), I had this unexpected surprise of having my collar bones finally show themselves, and I was shocked at how feminine it made me feel. I had never even realized they weren't really apparent before that. I loved it at the time, and felt so happy wearing shirts that showed them off, never knowing before that how such a small thing could be so motivating. I cannot wait for them to show themselves again, and can practically feel them wanting to melt off the excess fat around them to be able to show themselves off. :)
One day at a time.... But over time, I will get there.