Sunday, May 05, 2013
..but it is getting easier after just a week of biking. I donīt feel like having a heart attack ALL the time now
I am stressed by doing the paper as usual - I feel inadequate and not happy with my performance - as usual, as usual, as usual.
A situation has ocurred with the daughter - I found a "writing and drama camp" for a week during the summer, it was a day camp and I will be working but it really suits her. She wants to but her father says he has planned to be with her and will not allow it... I have to go through my papers and find the agreement and try to make him change his mind. I donīt have much hope because he is not that much for changing stuff. And I must try not to get crazy over this, when I have done as much as I can I will have to let go and mind my own business. But there are som many feelins of despair, anxiety, sadness and just wanting to give up.
And today my daughter and her church choir is doing their final show for this spring - I will not be there. I do feel horrible but I donīt want to spend the time or money because it does not seem to matter.
No, this is not my best day in life...