60,000-79,999 SparkPoints 76,942

Quick update... title wave and nibbling elbows :)

Saturday, May 04, 2013

Well, today has been interesting.

emoticon Started off with a dog walk, a little longer than I have been doing. It seems Utah can handle it.
emoticon 3 miles on the treadmill. Doing inclines lately.
emoticon Same ol' ab work that I enjoy.

Then I started working with the desktop.

emoticon Tears come all of the sudden. I was looking over at my beautiful boy and I am listening to him breathe and it all come back like a ...

title wave. I can hear my Aspen girl breathing. AND of course I am missing her. It hits hard and I feel the pain deep inside. May 10th is the anniversary of her passing.

I can not believe it will be 2 years. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I remember it all so clearly.

I try very hard to snap myself out of it. in reality, it is hard to believe I love Utah so. I really do. I feel the same comfort when I watch him sleep (like a mother watches a child I suppose). I know, I am so odd. I could watch all day and love the sound of his breathing. It was just this morning that it reminded me so much of Aspen. I am lucky to have Utah.

Snap out of it, is what I did. We got the new wireless adapter I ordered last weekend. Long drawn out story. On the phone with Lynksys. After frustrations and about 2 hours the computer is faster than it has been for a long time.
emoticon It is the computer my man uses.
emoticon My personal and work laptops work fine.

Laundry and some quick bathroom cleaning done.
emoticon Studying for the PMP certification.... yes, still studying.
Yes, I need to fill out the application and Yes, I need to pick a date to take the test.

emoticon Took the pups for another walk because Utah is back nibbling on my elbows as I sit at the kitchen table trying to work. My lovely boy. I love when he does that. He wants to play with his MaMa.

My man wants to go out tonight. I am trying not to stress. No reason to stress like I used to (I try to remind myself). I will look fine... less worries about what I will wear and my weight.

Well, that's my life today. HUGS to you my friends.

Actually, I should add, the vet never called back about the ...

I have calmed myself down a bit. I realize the vet likely wants to see the impact of the slight change in Phenobarbital dosage prior to making other changes. This makes sense to me so I am trying to be patient because adding anything or changing his food. His follow up appointment to test his liver enzyme levels and phenobarb levels is not until May 16th. Oh and YES...

Tuesday will be 7 weeks since Utah's last seizure.

fingers crossed.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • POOH_BEAR_69
    Will be sending hugs and prayers your way both for Utah's upcoming appointment and for the anniversary ahead... It sounds like you had a VERY productive day! I wish my days were that productive... Aspen will always have a place in your heart. The good memories are to be cherished. Utah sounds like a very special boy, and I know he really loves his momma, too!

    1565 days ago
    Hugs and prayers for Utah's test. I hope all goes well, and a good sign since 7 weeks from last episode. emoticon

    Don't despair about the tears. You loved Aspen, you will always miss her, and those tears will come for a long time. She will always be with you, in your heart. Cherish every thought of her.

    Study hard, you will do fine. Keep up the exercise with Utah. He sounds like he loves his walks with you. emoticon
    1567 days ago
    Big emoticon

    Hope all goes well with Utah!

    1567 days ago
    emoticon , can relate.......on another note, your one productive woman!
    1567 days ago
    I think title wave days are to be expected. The pain will never go away totally and she will always be your Apsen and you will always miss her. So forgive yourself, give yourself a hug and remember that it is okay to be sad even when you are strong!

    1567 days ago
    Cute picture of you and your pup. Sounds like you had a productive day. Hope you enjoy your evening out! emoticon
    1567 days ago
    Aspen will always be in your heart. It's only natural to think of her on the upcoming anniversary of her passing and to miss the heck out of her. No matter who comes into your life Aspen will always be your BFF.
    1567 days ago
    Funny how we always remember those days. My best buddy Dusty died almost 6 years ago and last night we were talking about the day and the tidal wave of tears came. Our dear Penelope has been gone almost 3. Not that we can ever replace them but we have so much love to give that it's good that we've gotten new pets to share it with. emoticon
    1567 days ago
  • CHERYLA2012
    Fingers crossed along with you!
    emoticon emoticon
    1567 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/4/2013 7:52:42 PM
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by REMEMBER2BME