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Yikes and a wasted morning

Thursday, May 02, 2013

So, do I get work done outside or take an hour and walk? This used to be a no-brainer question. I'd get out and walk, and then eventually I was running. I always did it early on MWF.

Now, I can still do that. Then work outside. But I do miss being able to sit out on the porch when the sun in streaming in, checking my email, reading, or just daydreaming. It seems sometimes that I only feel responsible if I'm doing something I'm supposed to be doing. Maybe I just need to schedule my sloth.

Heading outside for now to work. The morning bit the big one. I had a massage scheduled at 8:50 so I'd be done and back home early. (My third one -- I'm doing one per month, since they help my back so much. I was recently diagnosed with more stenosis and arthritis, now in my upper back). So while I'm there, she finds a tick on me! I went to my husband's work, which is health-oriented, and the nurse there said, "Oh, we can't do that." I said, (because I was so irritated) "Oh, Jesus Christ!" (maybe sort of a prayer for patience), grabbed a hemostat lying there and had Hub pull it off. It was kind of behind me in the bra strap area and I couldn't reach it myself.

The head came out with it, and it looks much like a dog tick, so I think I'm fine. I'll pay attention for flu-like symptoms. But there was a nickel-sized red circle right near where the tick bit me. Not the same place. So, given the circumstances, I went by my doctor's office to take a look at it. The nurse practitioner said it probably is fungal. Oh great. Ringworm?! None of my animals are showing any symptoms, but I'll have to check to make sure. I got some anti-fungal creme at the store on my way home. I've had it before, and this isn't real itchy yet, so I'll keep an eye on it and if it gets any worse or not better in 2 weeks, I'll go back.

Geez. What a wasted day. So now I feel I really do have to go get some work done. I did pick up some good things for healthy meals at the store, so I'm being good there. I have GOT to get some of this weight off before it gets any worse. All my clothes - jeans, bras, shirts -- are too tight and I refuse to buy larger ones. I simply am not going to go there again. I'm disgusted with myself, which is exactly where I need to be.

Just a note -- when I say "disgusted," it's a good thing. It means I am sick and tired of my excuses and I'm ready to get serious. :)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You can do it, sister. I know you can. I am also at the point where my slacks are uncomfortable and I Will Not Buy New Ones! Neither will you.
    1710 days ago
    An emergency room nurse I worked with told us a story about a patient who came in during the night and was terrified because he had a tick on him. She took a look and wiped it off with a tissue. It was a piece of dirt! I always pull them off myself. I get a reaction from tick bites and I just hate them!
    1726 days ago
    How frustrating to have a day which seems to be so wasted. It will pass. So much of life is about administrating things so that we can try to live a life..
    1727 days ago
    I love your attitude! A family member has continually urged me to buy bigger clothes over the years even to "graduate" to plus size stores, and my response has always been: isn't it better to just lose the weight?
    I feel enough is enough, I can't just keep expanding and going for elastic waist pants or larger clothes every year LOL! I draw the line in the sand!
    In our situations it is ok to be "disgusted" at our behaviour and poor choices if it motivates us to make lifestyle changes that are positive. It isn't the same as being disgusted by our bodies or to lower our self-esteem. It is more about accepting responsibility for and ownership of our lifestyle choices. And channeling it into determination to take positive action.
    Hope your problem with the tick etc. clears up soon and that your pets are ok too!
    It is great that you go walking/running every Mon Wed Fri early morning. Keep it up and you will do great! And probably be more affective at your work that you do after.
    emoticon emoticon
    1727 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/2/2013 7:07:28 PM
    Do not be digusted with yourself..please!Just get back to where you were and love yourself while doing it!!!

    1727 days ago
    I hate days like that. I go thru the same dilema. Many times after my workout, I just feel like sitting and relaxing and I end up putting alot of things aside. We just need to have a good plan and stick with it. That's what I'm working on anyway! You will get there!
    1727 days ago
    It is not easy, I know. I gained it all back and yes, I agree, it feels like crap. I understand the feelings of frustration, but please be kind to yourself...the negative self-talk might get you started but it isn't going to keep you going over the long term.

    emoticon emoticon

    1727 days ago
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