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    LOVEJOYPEACE9   3,714
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Ashamed


Thursday, May 02, 2013

I am ashamed that I have let myself get fat and out of shape.
I am ashamed to meet up with friends I've not seen in a while due to how I look.
I am ashamed that I dare to be a role model for my children.
I am ashamed when I'm with active, fit and healthy people.
I am ashamed when I see my old skinny clothes.
I am ashamed that I don't take time for me.
I am ashamed that when I do, I get critized and belittled.
I am ashamed I have no partner or support network in this effort.
I am ashamed that just 3yrs ago I ran a marathon & 6yrs ago climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro
I am ashamed in a swimsuit, to see myself or to be seen.
I am ashamed that I am not a good eating role model for my girls.
I am ashamed that feeling so ashamed has changed my personality. Really it has.
I am ashamed of myself.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LENNY408 5/14/2013 5:30PM

    The fact that you can admit to yourself that you now have new goals, is great motivation in itself. You are on your way to checking off each one of those points above. Keep your head up...you can do this!

Keep in mind that you have done this before and you can do it again. :)

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4EVERNESS 5/2/2013 3:13PM

    I am proud of myself that I have sense to work at getting back in shape.
I am proud that I have a wonderful family to love and care for.
I am proud that my children see a mom who's trying, who doesn't give up.
I am proud that I use my old skinny clothes as motivation for who I want to be again.
I am proud that I wrote this blog for me.
I am proud that I opened myself up to find people who will help support my efforts.
I am proud that my standards are high enough that I care, perhaps too much, what others think of me.
I am proud that I have achieved things for individual sense of accomplishment that few would ever dare to do.
I am proud that I will soon be in my swimsuit again that I can enjoy swimming with my children.
I am proud of myself for opening myself up to learn good eating habits, as well as open to learn from my children.
I am proud that I have learned to turn my life around so that I no longer hurt others by exaggerated sense of self shame!

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RAINSAYRE 5/2/2013 2:04PM

    Try to change that internal dialogue by looking at what the facts are and what your opinions are. And then remix that internal dialogue to something more helpful. A few examples:

Fact: I ran a marathon 3 years ago
Opinion: I'll never be able to do that again
Remix: I've run a marathon in the past, and with some hard work, I'll be able to do it again.

Fact: I climbed Mt Kilimanjaro 6 years ago.
Opinion: I'd never be able to do that again, and I'm ashamed I let myself get so out of shape.
Remix: There is such a feeling of exhilaration from accomplishing something difficult. I want to feel that way again. I don't need to climb a mountain to be fit, but I think I'll go find an activity I enjoy and will give me a sense of accomplishment.

Fact: My girls look to me as a role model
Opinion: I'm a terrible role model for my daughters
Remix: I love my girls and I want to be a good role model. I will avoid bringing junk food into the house, even though I know they'll object, because that's what's best for all of us.

Now you give it a try.

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Comment edited on: 5/2/2013 2:05:17 PM

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PEZCATHY 5/2/2013 2:01PM

    You have made a great decision though to not continue to wallow in self-pity and begin to do something to turn the tables around and be proud of yourself again! You can do it! I know you can. It's a hard journey, I am just starting, and it's hard for me too. But we can do it!



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JUULEE 5/2/2013 1:52PM

    " I am proud that I have decided to get slim and back in shape"

You left that off ;-)


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