Wednesday, May 01, 2013
Okay, so I've been doing everything I'm supposed to: tracking my food, eating my freggies, cardio every day, water. I've been doing Spark Coach for a month. How much weight have I lost? Nada. Bupkus. Zilch. Granted, I haven't gained, but still. Burning 4000 calories a week and NOTHING TO SHOW? REALLY????? 'Taint funny, McGee.
Discouraged? D@mn right I am. Irritated, depressed, hopelessly annoyed and frustrated? Affirmative.
It is clear that something is not working. When I look at all the success blogs, I see stuff like "I lost six pounds this week!" and I'm all "shut the h3ll up." Seriously. Just shut. Your. Pie. Hole. Okay, I'm fast forwarding through this rant, mostly because I'm just tired of doing it. Admit it. There are times when you are tired of being happy for others and want some of that happiness for yourself and are just tired of hearing about it when you just can't seem to have any.
I wish I could find a common thread. I mean, I read stuff from folks on the featured blogs, and the only common thread I see is not giving up. But you know... I've been at this crap for four years, and quite frankly, Scarlett, I'm ready to see SOME kind of success.
It is clear that biking is not going to do it for me. It doesn't seem to matter how many calories I burn on that bike, it does nothing for me weight-wise. Even my doctor is mystified. My thyroid is normal. My blood pressure, A1C, cholesterol, triglycerides, and blood sugar is all normal. Healthy, even. So what gives? Meanwhile, everyone else seems to pass gas and lose five pounds automatically. Okay, I know that most of you are experiencing your own frustrations, too. It's just all the success stories that are meant to inspire me are actually bringing me down and making me feel like a freak. "But it's not about competing with others!" I hear the coaches say as they begin their list of platitudes. YES. IT. IS. How do we even know what is normal unless we come up for air every once in a while and see what everyone else is up to? I mean, there's a reason everyone avoids hermits and ostracizes those who are different and don't follow "the norm" or "the rules". It's about comparing yourself to others and fitting in. Why can't I be normal like everyone else? Why do I have to be the fat freak? Am I going to resemble a third string linebacker for Green Bay for the rest of my life?
There is one thing that I'm not doing at all, and that is strength training. And when I am eating (as opposed to clamming up and refusing any sustenance just because eating is a chore), I tend to be on the high side of my range. And while my freggie intake is acceptable, it could always be improved, as could protein intake.
So here is my experiment for just one month: I'm going to focus on strength training every day. I know, I know. All the articles we read are all about having rest days. Well, to get better at piano, I have to practice every day. Some days I practice longer than others, but I still practice every day. When I miss a day, I crash and burn in my next practice session and have to waste time recovering old ground. You know what else? Olympic athletes practice every day. Maybe not the same intensity, but they practice every day. So, if it's good enough for my piano playing, and it's good enough for an Olympian, it's good enough for me. I will start out slow and build to the end of the month. I will take my measurements tomorrow, and then again on June 1. If there is no positive change in weight or measurements, then I'm going to go on a fad diet that a couple of my Facebook friends are pushing. THEY'RE getting results. THEY'VE kept it off for a year. I'm tired of failing, and I'm tired of waiting.
Ballet Beautiful Bridge Series: 15 minutes of burning buttocks
Ballet Beautiful Abs series: 5 minutes of my abs not being quite as bad off as I thought
Ballet Beautiful Body Blast Arms: 10 minutes, because my cat jumped me and my arms gave out.
Total: 30 minutes
Of course, even if my weight and measurements stay the same, I bet I'll be strong enough to pick up and throw anyone who gives me grief about my size, and I'll probably be able to launch my uncooperative scale into the next county. Not a total waste of time.