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Parents!


Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Yesterday, I spent 3 hours at the adult day care center to find out all the details about getting my parents to go there. It really is a great program with wonderful people. It's for 6 hours a day and anywhere from one to 7 days a week, your choice. They pick you up and bring you home which in Moms case is in the wheelchair. They get breakfast, a full lunch and a mid afternoon lite snack. Programs include lectures, bands and fun activities. They try to keep them busy all day but there is a TV and recliners. All of this for $75.00 per day!

When I presented it to my parents after, all they were interested in was how much and anything over $10. Per day was too much! There were programs for help but my parents are not eligible for most and the others they don't want to be bothered to applying for them.

I am so frustrated. They don't realize how close to going into a nursing home they are and how this would keep them in their own house longer. Yesterday, Dad left the frying pan on the stove, it caught fire and charred the kitchen ceiling! He was in the other room watching TV when Mom smelled smoke. It's such a sad situation.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CTUPTON 6/30/2013 6:36AM

    Show them the daily cost of a nursing home as opposed to the day program. That might wake them up! Good luck, Chris

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CTUPTON 4/30/2013 6:57PM

    Keep at it! Be strong! This is really, really tough! It is the right thing to do.

They will be there together which is just wonderful!

chris

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LGAR519 4/30/2013 2:35PM

    Pretty much going through the same thing now. It's very sad!

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NHES220 4/30/2013 12:06PM

    I certainly feel your pain with aging parents. My Dad is 89 and my Mom is 80. My Dad just stopped driving and his health is failing. My sisters and I divide up the errands, shopping, church, doctors appointments, etc. Luckily my Mom is still very with it, but my Dad is slipping. My sister's ex-husband cuts the grass for them and shovels the snow. But my parents would never spend the money on day care either, even though they have it. I'm not sure how much longer my parents can stay in their house before they will need to move to a condo. My Mom has COPD and gets short of breath with the stairs and my father is losing his mobility and they do not have a bedroom or bathroom on the main level, but they will not yet consider moving. Hang in there, I certainly understand what you are going through.
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SAINTBERNARD6 4/30/2013 11:24AM

    Is it feasible to consider assisted living for them??

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AMYTRIPP 4/30/2013 10:50AM

    That is just so difficult. I'm sure they don't want to admit they need to have some supervision, but when it becomes dangerous, then it's time for a change.

And, yep, $75 per day probably sounds like a lot to them, but perhaps you should mention that a nursing home will be a lot more than that. I don't know how much they are in your area, but the one my mother in law is staying at for rehab costs as much as $8000 per month....

The daycare you found sounds great. My younger son, Mark, has played guitar at parties for the local Adult Day Care.

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