Another good food day.
I've been thinking a lot of how my attitude towards food is changing.
At lunch today, I was having a veggie wrap(wrap,cheese,sprouts+tomat
oes) and lentil soup, and I kept thinking how good it was.
Of course when you're starving, everything tastes so good!
But really....I was very grateful that I'm not a fussy eater.
good food...fruits,veggies, whole grain everything!
I did not put any mayo on my wrap because I really,really like to taste the veggies.
I can throw pretty much anything together and I will love it.
That's what happens when I don't binge!
I eat very weird food combination sometimes, and if it's healthy, it gets thrown in!
I made some muffins yesterday and I did not like them.
Others said they were good, and I could not figure out why I did not like them.
Thinking about it today, I realized that it's probably because it was made with white flour and to me it had no taste because i'm getting used to whole wheat/grain flour.
The bad part is, when i'm binging, is does not matter that the food is bland, or that I don't really like it, or that it's not healthy, or it's not food that I would normally think to eat......I eat it so fast that I don't taste it anyways, and the point of eating is just to fill the void or to get numb over something I don't want to face.
And then because i'm full of sugar and bad carbs, the cravings start and I eat more and more and then the "natural" good foods don't taste as good.
But I was proud of myself today!
I was in a situation that somebody said something that normally would have sent me into a tailspin of emotions and food cravings and the binging that comes with it.
But today, I looked at her and said" you know, it really does not change anything in my life and there is nothing I can do about it, or nothing I can do to change it, and that's the reality of life. Life goes on."
She was really surprised.
And so was I!
Going home, I was assessing my feelings and thinking that I WAS handling that really well!
I think i'm finally learning that life is life and it's going to happen weather I binge or not.
And i'd rather not!
I often say this prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can't,
And the wisdom to know the difference!
Amen to that!