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    GRANDMABABA   122,787
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Monday, April 29, 2013

Just over 3 weeks ago I began working 10-12 hours every day to get our house ready to sell. I'm so exhausted and ms acting up in some scary ways. I'll see my neurologist next week as still too much on my plate until then. My dd and sil made promises to do some things that they repeatedly failed to keep. Since we let them live there for 30+ months rent free our expectation was that they would keep it up. It is about 5,200 sq ft so plenty of space for their family of five plus German shepherd. When I finally lost my temper with my sil, he just laughed.... This after he failed to repair floors he promised to repair the week before. He managed to miss the deadline when the photographer came and even the next day when about 30 realtors came through on tour. His mess was still evident in three rooms. He told me I never have to speak to him again. I told him that's not very mature. He laughed. I cried. I've not seen or heard from him or dd since. We've been so generous in every way...we've been Santa, Easter bunny, bought almost all the kids' clothes and this was the third time they moved in with us. The difference this time is that we moved out onto a condo to give them their privacy and space. As they moved into their new home we let them take lots of furniture, appliances, large snow blower, lawn mower, other power and hand tools, ladders, etc., etc. Meanwhile the house and yard were left in very poor shape! I am so sad and really tired of being a door mat. My ms is a big challenge, but because I must help with an important convention this Thursday, Friday, Saturday I just pray I can stay on my feet for one more week. I'll be hosting and introducing scholarship recipients, have a large display to complete, and have three related events to attend. Thanks, friends, for letting me vent. You are the best!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VOLARI52 5/2/2013 12:25PM

    Barbara.....first I have missed your posts....and I have been thinking about you and wondering how the house clean up went.....so very sorry you DD's family has taken advantage of your tremendous generosity....I have been there and done that ...all in the name of helping my children....but in your case I hope you are taking care of your self....that is number one priority.....please remember that.....take care and hoping things get better..... emoticon



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LINDAF49 4/30/2013 7:01PM

    Oh sweet gramma, My heart cries for you as we listen and care and sadly the kids do not...Gentle hugs and be sure to do all you can to support your MS through this ...drink extra water, eat good clean protein and produce and rest when you can...even if only ten minutes of laying down and weeping, it is good to do. When I am so over done, sometimes I take a tablet and pen to the bathroom and lock the door and organize my thoughts on paper, rinse my face with cool water, have another big drink of water then come out and face the world again. Big hugs...we pray and you keep going... Know you are loved and the Lord does see your pain physically and emotionally. time for tough love..stick to your guns and keep on going. Hugs and prayers!

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PHATPAT18 4/30/2013 6:29PM

    Oh, that is so sad. I let my DD live with me after college and she was such a slob. I encouraged her to get her own apartment and she moved into one with her boyfriend. The pair of them are equally as slobbish and have dirty floors and dishes loaded up all over the kitchen. When their lease is up in July,, they will find out that they have a lot of work to do. There will be no moving back home. She has not proven that she can take care of an apartment let alone one room. When the security deposit is not returned, she will have learned an expensive lesson. I feel for you and I hope that some day this rift will pass and they will realize how gracious and generous you were with your property, and if not, you will have to learn to live with what you did to help them and just feel good about that. Bless you.

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MADAMEJEANNE 4/30/2013 2:49PM

    Remember the Lord loves you and sees your good works and will reward you....He is able to help in every situation-even disappointments!

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NELLJONES 4/30/2013 9:22AM

    Abuse has two players: the abuser and the one allowing the abuse. I've been where you are: "this time will be different". Which assumes they will think the way I think. Alas,it hasn't worked out well for me, either.

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SWEETLIPS 4/30/2013 8:16AM

    We are here to hear you. I lifted prayers and please don't let people with dirty feet walk through your mind. Stay strong in Christ Jesus. God has many blessings for you.

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NANCYPAT1 4/30/2013 12:15AM

    Prayers for your peaceful resolution of your family's poor treatment of your house and your heart and that your strength holds out until what needs to be done gets done.

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MSLZZY 4/29/2013 11:17PM

    emoticon your family has treated you so shabbily. I have a feeling they will come crawling back the next time they need something. Time to calmly say no and mean it.

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TRIANGLE-WOMAN 4/29/2013 8:28PM

    emoticon

My DH was in the military for 22+ years entailing 6 moves over that time. I know what it takes to get a house ready to show!

Don't let the haters bring you down. You are a good person!!

(`♥) .♥.*`*♫.♥
.*..♥ We can do it one day at a time!!

..*) ♥.*)
(. .♥ (. .♥ (.*`* ♥☆.*`*♥☆
;.*
`*♥☆ Keep Spreading the Spark!!!

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GRAYGRANNY 4/29/2013 8:06PM

    Sorry sweetie........wished we lived next door or close by ....I would gladly help you out. Some people just don't appreciate the goodness of some people. Perhaps they will grow up soon. I had always said my grandchildren would grow up long before their Dad (my son)....lol in fact, I think one of them has, and sadly the other one is following her Dad's footsteps

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CARRAND 4/29/2013 7:09PM

    I'm sorry to hear about your family problems. You deserve better. Don't let yourself be a doormat!

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KAYLSLYNN 4/29/2013 6:35PM

    ALWAYS GLAD TO LISTEN. I AM SO SORRY FOR YOU. FAMILY PROBLEMS ARE SO HARD. PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. NO BODY ELSE CAN LIKE YOU CAN. PLEASE STAY STRONG.

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MEADSBAY 4/29/2013 5:51PM

    I am so very sorry that your daughter and sil are abusing you in this way after all you have done for them.
And, yes, if your dd is standing by and letting her dh laugh at you, she is as guilty as he is.
Take care of yourself.
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DELLMEL 4/29/2013 5:47PM

  Sometimes we need others to listen to what's going on to help usto get ot together



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