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Being Noticed or Not - What's Better???

Monday, April 29, 2013

When I was ~300 lbs I didn't WANT to be noticed. But I was. People would turn around and look when my butt knocked clothes off racks and stuff off shelves. They harumphed when I stuck my butt in their face as I navigated my way to a table in restaurants and climbed over them to a theater seat. They were visibly annoyed and almost panicked when I made my way to sit in the airplane seat next to them. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Now that I'm 87 lbs lighter, my youngest dd tells me I look 'medium'. WTH does THAT mean???

It means people that didn't know me at 300lbs don't think twice about me in the above situations. They don't comment on my size or appearance. I just blend in with the crowd. Sometimes I want to shout "LOOK AT ME!!! I've lost 87 lbs!!!!"

On the other hand, I have a love/hate reaction to the people that DID know me at 300lbs.
emoticon emoticon

Sometimes I LOVE the fuss and compliments and attention. emoticon

Sometimes well meaning remarks come out stupid - One long time guy friend of DH saw me a few sizes ago and just laughed and laughed saying he just couldn't believe it. He said I looked good in a way that he was amazed that I didn;t fail. And then he said that now I could fit better in my Mustang. WOW. I just kindof laughed along, but thought 'What a JERK!" emoticon

Sometimes people don't say anything and I wonder if I really don't look that different. emoticon

My dad and DH fall into this category. Since they are tops on my list for approval, it's been a bit weird. My dad is 88 years old and into his own thing and friends at his assisted (aka 'cruise ship') living apt, so I understand and let that one go.

But DH??? He never gave his opinion about me having WLS. He always said it was my body, my decision and he loves me the way I am. As the pounds fell off, he never said anything. Finally I badgered him about why he never comments and he said 'I thought if I said how good you look, you would stop trying.'

DUH! I told him it DOESN'T work that way!!! Other men commenting on my weight loss and appearance and looking at me makes me uncomfortable. I told him that HIS opinion is the only one I cared about and want to hear. HIS opinion motivates me to do better and more and stay on track.

Then I turned around, stuck my butt out and said 'Now isn't this the sexiest @$$ you've EVER seen???! And the answer BETTER BE YESSSSS!!!'

We both cracked up laughing!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I love being the center of attention. At 260 pounds or at 133 pounds I love being in the spotlight. I have always been that way.

    You are doing such a wonderful job, Keep up the awesome work!
    1785 days ago
    I think part of it is that they are afraid that if they say you look great, you'll start wondering if they didn't think you looked great before... It really can be a double edged sword for someone to compliment changes in another person. And then, heaven forbid, what if the person making the changes starts sliding backwards after all the complements? But you let him know what you want in a great way!!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1787 days ago
    Trust me, he is WAY proud of you! Guys are funny about things like that.
    May the two of you keep falling in love each day.
    Bless you!
    1787 days ago
  • CECE0330
    ha! My DH insisted at WHATEVER weight I was at that I was "sexy" to him. I honestly don't think it ever mattered, but I DO however get way more compliments now from him. I think that is mostly because he KNOWS all the work that goes into it, so part of it is that he is in awe that I can be so disciplined about certain things.

    Nice job on 87lbs! That's awesome!!!!
    1788 days ago
  • HINK2013
    My husband is the same way - had very little to say about the WLS, except that he was ok with me doing it.... and hasn't really made a single comment about how I look so far. But I'm not quite to 87 pounds lost yet.

    You are doing great!! Keep focused on your goals!!
    1788 days ago
  • -RUBIES-
    You look fantastic! Keep up the good work!
    1788 days ago
  • NHES220
    I sometimes think guys just don't get it. But I hope his answer was yes and that he starts saying something. I pointed out to my husband that I was down to another notch on my belt that I bought recently and he told me he was proud of me. So, I'll take that! You should be proud of the 87 lbs and keep up the good work!

    1788 days ago
    emoticon You have done remarkable! emoticon It is great that you have a network of supporters. Keep up the great work and am glad you have sense of humor! emoticon
    1788 days ago
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