Friday, April 26, 2013
I'm having a very hard time with this.
I don't know if I can even begin to write about it.
There are something like 40 Sparkpeople participating this year - the JASR crew did themselves proud. Coach Nancy spearheaded an effort to have some folks volunteer at a water station. There is a dinner planned for Saturday night (and more - I just realized I've not been getting the notifications from the facebook group so I've missed a lot of the planning, trying to get caught up and get details).
And breaking news from one of the local organizers - "SparkPeople is sponsoring a booth Sunday May 5 at the Flying Pig Marathon Post Race Party at Yeatman’s Cove. I've posted this file with a layout of Yeatman's Cove and the booth locations. SparkPeople is at booth #12. I will be setting a meeting time for all of us to converge on the booth. I thought that might be a good spot for a group picture, plus you can meet some other Spark employees there. Let me know if you have questions. For now, I just thought it was fun that Spark decided to have a booth and wanted to share that info."
And I'm sitting here in tears, wishing somebody - ANYBODY - had given a damn last year. I tried so *fricken* hard...
As it turns out, I have plans on Friday night that I swapped work shifts for, which means I'm working Saturday - because I totally spazzed it was Flying Pig weekend. I suspect I blocked it out since I couldn't afford to register and thus haven't trained, AND since I'm having such a hard time wanting to be enthusiastic about all the spark love and not taking it personally. And that's hard to admit.
But, I WILL be at that booth, dammit. And if there's any kind of meet up that I can squeeze into the weekend, I'll be there. And here's hoping some of the Sparkiness will rub off and I'll find my own spark again. I've been floundering - it's been a tough semester and I'm just coming up for air, and am seriously trying to get back into the swing of healthy living. So it's a good time for it.
But I gotta tell ya...bittersweet doesn't even *begin* to touch the emotional rollercoaster I'm dealing with here. Not even a little bit.