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Incredibly happy!

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

I am skeptical of metaphysics and self-help that advocates surface positive thinking; but as you know ( previous entries) I have struggled with severe anxiety most of my life and this has been exasperated by lengthy international job contract searches and negotiations. I am not a negative person but the nature of my stressful living situation + anxiety twists most thoughts in this direction so I must take meaningful steps to change this.

Yesterday I wrote this:

"Soon I will become a positive, valued teacher and co-worker. This vocation is so important and precious that naturally it will take time to be sorted.

I deserve this position and it has now come to me through diligence, ambition and passion for education. I am appreciated not only for who I am on paper but also proven through my expertise and actions.

I know that I am and will continue to be a big blessing to my colleagues and the children I teach. My duty to myself and this vocation is to keep learning, preparing and remaining positive for this position. I ask the powers that be (God) and my ancestors to bless this process and dream. May we come together and make great things happen."¨

The thing about positive affirmations is that you are *supposed* to believe them but of course this is easier said than done.

My anxiety has a tendency to crush me so I got into the habit of checking email right before I go to bed so I could avoid no news all day and dream about a response the next day.
Yesterday I checked my email to find a formal contract and job offer. Wait VORBEI!!!

I have obtained the dream job! This position/place I have been envisaging of working for even before I graduated with my MA in May 2011. I applied twice over the course of three years, most recently in October. I saw there was a still a demand in February and got a little mad. I fit the ideal candidate portfolio so I sent an email asking if there was something wrong with my qualifications.

I found out I had been accidently overlooked and they were so apologetic. I went from crestfallen that the dream job didn't want me to being fast tracked through interviews, qualification checks in a matter of weeks. Other job possibilities were looming but I WANTED THIS.

...and I still had to wait and wait. Yes, I had to send an email for follow up on Monday after three weeks of post interview wonder.

I'll keep this journal short and sweet but I believe that the take away from this story is simple: be brave enough to ask for what you want keep improving/expanding your skillset in the meantime. Seek advice when you need it. If you can, make yourself an irresistible candidate. Yes, my degree is great, my ambition great but the fact that I worked in a newly founded Kindergarten in Russia and speak German made me *irresistible.* The email began yesterday with: we definitely want to hire and welcome you.

If I had not sent that secondary email in February I would still be wondering.

I thank you all for your prayers and well wishes, I pray for many people here and many people I know and I know good energy makes all the difference.
I still need your prayers. We now begin the bureaucratic processes of obtaining residency and work permits. I do see a trip or two to the German consulate in the near future. German bureaucracy while not corrupt dots every j and crosses every t. There is a tendency for over exactness, including myself, with Germans. This could take a couple of weeks or months. I could be rejected the first time or I could need some obscure piece of paperwork.

I will commence my new position in August or September in the Greater Frankfurt area! I look forward to continuing to being a part of the great German Kindergarten tradition. Some of you may know that the concept of Kindergarten began in Germany. I find it an incredibly inspiring history and follow foundational pedagogical principals to this day. Some of you might also know that the very first Kindergarten in the US was established in Wisconsin by German immigrants. My Mother is a Wisconsin Bavarian.

{A sign in Bad Blankenburg Germany marking the first Kindergarten, taken on a nerdy pilgrimage in July 2012!)

For those who might be wondering: I think I must be in some sort of shock¡KI am exhausted and happy but not teary eyed---yet.

{Kazan Russia April 2012-Planting our Indoor Garden, gardens a huge principal of the original Kindergarten.}

{A bit of teacher Mom knows I can't do math...}
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Member Comments About This Blog Post

    Congratulations on accepting your dream job ! That's wonderful news that you'll be teaching in Germany. As you know, I received a job offer after having been laid off for several months. Something must be in the air because several people I know (you're now on the list) who've been out of work have found jobs in the month of April.


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    1393 days ago
    Congratulations on the new job! I'm going through a rough time I'm in a position I love but with recent budget cutbacks my job is on the line. Rather than focus on the negative I have decided I will make a new résumé and with my recent confidence boost from my weight loss I think I will be pretty irresistible in the job market. I will know more on Monday if I get to stay or if I will be put on the surplus list. Keep up the great work! emoticon emoticon
    1400 days ago
    1402 days ago
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I KNEW you could do it!! How very exciting for you! We are all cheering your great news! Now let's get those I's dotted and those T's crossed and life will be worth living again!! So very happy for you!
    1403 days ago
    I am so very happy for you ! .. What a great outcome .. Congratulations Samantha xx
    Much love Susie xx emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1403 days ago
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