disturbing one's personal space ---
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
i never realized how many people in my life are 'pot stirrers' - like to dish the dirt etc.
i always try to take comments in a good light - but as i have gotten older i see many times i was actually being 'centered out', insulted, belittled etc. wow, how stupid i am.
in a way it is a blessing - or i may have never spoken to them again - but now i will have to stand up for myself when this occurs.
here are some examples - at many family events - both casual and formal - i have had a cousin, husband, aunt etc - come into my personal space, look at my plate and criticize what is on it. 'why did you add dressing to your salad?' ' do you need that dinner roll', 'i can't believe you are having pie - are you not watching you weight anymore?"
i have had one cousin in particular accost me with the fact that one of my children is quite obese - why was i not doing something about it??? this child is a grown adult and did not develop this problem until long after he graduated university and moved out of my home. but that seems to not make any difference - every time he has a chance to say it he does.
i feel mortified - and i do not want to create spectacle (the last time was at a funeral dinner) but i need to stop it.
what surprises me is that so many of these people have had (or still have) weight problems themselves. you would think they would understand - instead i feel like a voodoo doll - keep sticking it to me!
have you had this happen to you - is it still happening - how can we deal with this as i refuse to become an avoider.