Tuesday, April 23, 2013
I saw an interesting question on spark about thoughts while running, so I began to examine mine.
Recently, I have been realizing just how much I criticize myself. I apologize to people constantly, even if I am not at fault. I have done it all my life and it is a habit I would love to work on.
So, anyway, today I was doing my run and I was doing really well. The sun was out, I was keeping a good pace, I was just happy.
Then, I began to think back to other times when I walked slowly (30 minute mile, anyone?) and I began to feel down again.
Then I realized: I had to give myself permission to love myself. I needed to tell myself that it was OK, that I deserved to be happy. For so long, I put my life on hold trying to make others happy. My efforts only pushed them away and I was still miserable.
I picked up my pace and began to smile again. I ROCKED it today...I was pleased with my workout. I am allowing myself to bask in my victory.
Yes, I have faltered before...ran too slow, ate too much, just didn't really take it seriously.
But the beautiful and sad part about yesterday is that it's gone...the mistakes can't be fixed and the good times can't last forever.
But I can begin anew today...with a smile on my face.