Tuesday, April 23, 2013
I have always been a positive person. There is rarely a time when a person will pass me and I will not have a smile on my face. I am a great cheerleader and friend. I believe that other people are worthy and deserving of praise and love. But here's what I have figured out...The one person who I should be the biggest cheerleader for and friend to (myself) is the one person who I don't believe is worthy of it. WOW! That realization was a real turning point for me. If I am truly honest with myself I know that if I am not perfect then I think I am falling short. I hate blaming my childhood, but I grew up thinking (and being told) that I didn't measure up. So here I am...my imperfect self. Emotional eating has been my crutch for as long as I can remember. When the hurt of not measuring up, or fear of not being perfect creeps in I have turned to food for comfort. The emotional eating has manifested into my obesity and given me even more reason to feel that I'm not good enough. I'm sorry for the babbling, but I am really just sorting through this as I type. I have known these things, but writing it down really does make it sink in.
I went a bit deeper in this blog then I intended. What I meant to get to is that I am taking things one day at a time. I really have learned that I am worth just as much as anyone else, and just as deserving of praise and love. I know that I am not perfect, and that I don't need to try to be perfect. I just need to be me. The caring, loving, funny, friendly me. So I will enjoy TODAY. I will do my best to make good choices for my mind, body and spirit TODAY. I will choose to love myself TODAY. And hopefully...God willing...I will get a chance to do it again tomorrow.
Take care Peeps, and thanks for listening.